Friends, colleagues and sometimes people I don’t even know very well ask me this same question several times each year, AND I provide them with a baffled face and stammering answer every single time: “Hey, what book do you recommend for __(enter any couples issue)__ ? I’m thinking about buying a few books today.” OR …“I have a friend who is looking for a book.” OR,… “I want to recommend a book, can you help me?”
I struggle with two main issues when asked this question. First, I have no idea what the person or couple has already read. And secondly, people apply books and personal growth in such unique ways that sometimes what I think is a great read or extremely applicable might fall flat with another person. Or sometimes that flips and what I think isn’t necessarily sound or grounded information is the “key” to helping someone get out of a rut.
Therefore, understanding that you may have already read some (or all) of these books, and, that you may not get out of them what I or some of my clients have gotten, I’ve put together a list of the top five challenges I see couples face on a regular basis and books that might help in direct or indirect ways. However, I’ve also provided a bit of discussion to go along with the books so I’ll be breaking this post into two or three parts. Here we go…
To begin, I want to address the core “top three” basic challenges most couples will experience at some time in their life: opposing views on parenting, financial struggles, and sex/intimacy. In that order: