Relationships

Hitting BOTTOM: Relationship Issues With My “Saddlebags”

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I’ll be 48 years old in four weeks, I wear a women’s size 12, my dress shoe size is 7 and I weigh between 149-151 pounds every morning I check the scales.

In other words, I’m middle-aged, wear a middle-sized clothes, mid-range footwear and am in the middle of the 100 and 200 pound mark on the scales.  And, I’ve run out of excuses.  Here are the excuses, reasons or “logical thoughts” I’ve used for the past year to avoid a healthier lifestyle:

  1. I’m busy.
  2. I have a hard time prioritizing between my academic life and my personal life.
  3. The time with my husband and children are more important than exercising.
  4. I’m smaller than some of my friends.
  5. I’m smaller than my husband.
  6. I’m smaller than some of my family members.
  7. If I were really okay with my own self-image then it wouldn’t matter.
  8. I’ll start when I’m done with my Ph.D.
  9. I’ll start tomorrow.
  10. I’ll start on Monday.
  11. If my faith were stronger I wouldn’t be struggling so much.
  12. If I balance out the fat and sugar I’m consuming with all this good home-cooked food, then at least I’m getting the vitamins I need.
  13. My husband, children and family still love me regardless of my physical fitness.
  14. It’s my job’s fault.  It’s my fault.  It’s my genetics’ fault…

I’ve mentioned before that I’ve become a fan of The Pioneer Woman blog.  I’m checking in on Ree and her adventures about two or three times per week now, and she’s no longer coming between me and my husband.  One day she was writing about food and wrote parenthetically, “Lord, help my saddlebags.”

I'm walking around with two of these strapped permanently on my thighs. Click photo to buy one for your horse.

I started thinking about the saddlebag metaphor, referencing her hips as a body part with which she struggles.  That’s how I feel right now.  I feel weighted down from being my normal, energetic self.  I feel like I’m carrying around a load that I can’t unhitch.  So, I did just a few minutes of research and found this link explaining to the trail rider about Horse Saddle Bags: Packing For Success.

The information on their page is crystal clear.  Saddle bags are for packing a work load, but should be removed once the job is done.  They’re not to be worn 24 hours a day.  They also had some extremely deep information I related to myself when considering a saddle-bag purchase:

  1. Horse’s (Kelly’s) size
  2. Horse’s (Kelly’s…you get the picture) conditioning
  3. Horse’s build (conformation)
  4. Horse’s attitude
  5. Horse’s age
  6. Saddle size, fit and weight
  7. Saddle’s ability to distribute weight
  8. Rider’s weight and experience
  9. Saddlebag design and fit
  10. Distance of ride and type of terrain
  11. Weather (esp. heat and humidity)

In other words, you only buy the gear and load up the animal with what they can take, what type of horse it is, and what kind of ride you’re going to make.

I sat there with my permanent, oversized, weighted down saddle bags reading that article and thought: “This is it.”  In my relationship with myself, I have to help myself.  I can’t blame anyone, anything, any time…it’s up to me.

The only time I want to wear saddlebags is when I’m hiking a trail, or when I’m using real ones on a real horse for a real-life trail ride.

This past summer I began a running program and was successful at keeping it up in Oxford until I came back to Oklahoma.  But I can’t blame Oklahoma.  All I can do is realize that the only person who can help this situation is me.

What am I going to do?  One of two things.  I have a former student who now owns a fitness company.  I’m going to call him and explore that option.  I work at a University that emphasizes health all the time.  I’m going to explore that option.  Then I’m going to decide, face my fears, perhaps get rid of a scheduling obligation or two, and get started.  I’m scared, I don’t WANT to do this, but I really want to feel like myself again.

I’ll let you know how it goes ~ Red Dirt Kelly

Also…this is the photo of what’s sitting right in front of me on my desk.  Which do you think I need to find a new home for?

Water? Kisses? Which one needs to find a new home?

Check out the next entry in my “Saddlebags Saga”…that is, if you have the stomach for it!

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Foodie Page, Stockyards City Cookbook

Stockyards City Cookbook Cook-Through: Cowboy Caviar!

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Not exactly fish eggs…much better! I am a hairstylist and any excuse we can find to bring food to the salon we jump at. The day before Halloween we all dressed up and had a pot luck. I have to say I don’t think I have ever seen that much food in one place before! I knew from the past that its best to take something that can easily be snacked on in-between clients. Everyone at work “jokingly” calls me Betty Crocker; little do they know it’s really not as hard as it looks!

Flipping through the cookbook I looked for a recipe that had ingredients that I might already have at home. I finally decided on Cowboy Caviar. It definitely doesn’t look too pretty, if you’re a presentation person, but sure does taste good! (Friends at work turned their noses up at first but by the end of the day it was gone!) This is a very simple recipe if you need something last minute. Also, if you are following through the cookbook with us and cooking most of these items I would suggest buying a large bag of shredded cheese and a box of cream cheese from Sams. It will save you time and money, both of which I know we can all use these days!

Cowboy Caviar

by Tracy Holland

1 can black beans, rinsed and drained

1 (8oz) pkg. cream cheese, softened

2 cans chopped black olives

2 T. oil

2 T. lime juice ( I cut one lime in half and squeezed the juice from it into the mix)

1/4 tsp. ground cumin

1/4 tsp. salt

1/4 tsp. crushed red pepper

Combine beans, olives, oil, lime juice and spices. Let sit 2 hours. Spread cream cheese on a plate and top with bean mixture. Refrigerate until ready to serve.

Happy Cooking!

Whitni

Editor’s Note – Want to see the other recipe’s Whitni and Jani have prepared from the cookbook thus far?  Simply go to our “Categories” section on the right hand of our home page, and use the drop down selector to find “Stockyards City Cookbook.”

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Homestead and Garden, Oklahoma culture

Meanwhile, Back At The Ranch: Get Your Roof On With Rusty Hilger

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So my husband and I are building this barn, right?  And it’s really going pretty well thanks to our family and friends who have sacrificed some Saturdays and our two friends Trial and Error who are there every day.   The posts are in the ground and the trusses are up. It’s not that I don’t trust my husband’s judgment, but I just wanted to talk to an expert; enter former Oklahoma State University and NFL quarterback Rusty Hilger.

Rusty Hilger, today
After a successful college and NFL football career, Rusty is again leading his team in the home construction industry.

Julie: How did you get into the construction industry?

Rusty: I had just turned 16 in the summer of 1978 and I needed a way to pay for my first pickup truck. Trust me, it wasn’t much of a truck, but the $2.00 per hour I was earning at the local skating rink was no longer an option. South Oklahoma City was growing and new construction was everywhere. My truck and I got a job with a local homebuilder cleaning and organizing home sites prior to the final landscaping. In the summer of 1979, I worked for a roofing company and roofed my first house. During college, I worked summer construction jobs in Oklahoma City, Stillwater, and Tulsa for 3 different OSU Alumni. In 1985, an NFL career put my construction career on hold until 1990, when we undertook a four-month project to remodel and re-open the old Split-T restaurant in OKC. After retirement from the NFL in 1992, a career in construction seemed natural.

Julie: What kind of roof system is best suited for Oklahoma residents?

Rusty: Sooner or later (strike that; sorry Pistol Pete) at some point, most roof shoppers ask this simple question. First of all, the best roofing system for Oklahoma is not really a roof system at all. The best roofing system is actually “Full Replacement Cost” insurance with a $500 dollar deductible.  Why? Since January of 2008, according to the National Weather Service, we have had more than 140 days of severe hail measuring 3/4” or larger in Oklahoma. In May of 2010, the hailstones were so large they came through the roof and into the home in some neighborhoods. No roof system will withstand these conditions and it is only a matter of time before it happens at your home. Many of our clients have replaced their roofing systems twice within the past 3 years. Check your policy or contact your agent for details. If you don’t have Full Replacement Cost insurance, get it!

Julie:  Winter is on its way.  Do you have any advice regarding protection from Oklahoma ice?

Rusty: Protection against ice dams is required at eaves wherever the January average temperature is 25*F or lower or where there is a possibility of ice forming in the eaves. From Kansas to the North Pole this product is required as code. In Oklahoma it is an option, yet Oklahoma ice storms and snow create problems if this product is not used. It creates a 100% watertight seal that keeps water out at the most vulnerable areas of your roof (at the eaves and rakes, in valleys, around chimneys, pipes, etc.).

Julie: What is the biggest mistake that home owners make regarding roof upkeep or maintenance?

Rusty:  With the exception of storm damage, the weakest link in any roofing system remains the pipes sticking up through the roof. Most pipes are made of PVC and the pipe jack is a rubber-like material used to seal around the pipe. This rubber-like material will deteriorate over time at a faster rate than the shingles. The pipes should be checked every year and a special roofing silicone should be used to ensure a watertight seal.

Julie: What do you love the most about Oklahoma?

Rusty: Oklahomans are committed to the values important to me: God, family, friends, and football!. I was born and raised in Oklahoma City and attended Oklahoma State University before being drafted by the Los Angeles Raiders in 1985. I loved the time I spent in Manhattan Beach, Ca; Birmingham (Detroit) MI; Seattle, WA; Indianapolis, IN; Dallas, TX; and Nassau, Bahamas. Although these are some terrific cities, none of them compare to the down-home family lifestyle and attitude of our neighbors here in the great state of Oklahoma.

Julie:  If anyone has more questions about roof replacement, how can they contact you?

Rusty Hilger, #12
Rusty has lots of great information to share about protecting your home.

Rusty: If you have questions, send an email to contact@oklahomaroofing.net or call anytime at 405.227.9689.

Wow! Rusty had some great information to share.  The most surprising to me was that we both spent time on roofs in the 70’s!  If you want to know more about that, contact me.  If you need to know more about getting a new roof, you need to contact Rusty.Thanks to Rusty for sharing his expertise with me….and now with you!  Happy building!

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Faith

A Rare Not-So-Silent Sunday (Updated Sunday Night)

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Our faith writer, Lamar Jackson, is having a beautiful vacation with his family on a cruise ship somewhere in the Caribbean.  I’m filling in for him and decided to post a Simple Sabbath thought on Sunday, breaking our normal “Silent Sunday” framework.

I’ve recently become vaguely aware of the The Geneva-based World Council of Churches (WCC) and the Lausanne movement.  The Economist published an article on October 28th about the history of their purpose, struggles with mission and most recent progress in Cape Town.  I’ll be posting thoughts this afternoon about my perspective on this article, the history and movement, and what it means for Christians in our geographic area.

Until then, I hope you have a wonderful Sunday – silent, or not.  Prefacing my post this afternoon, I’m going to share a Bible verse with you.  The last two phrases have given me food for thought regarding this particular subject and I’ll begin with them.

7 Give to everyone what you owe them: If you owe taxes, pay taxes; if revenue, then revenue; if respect, then respect; if honor, then honor. ~ Romans 13:7

** Sunday evening follow-up.

So, it’s not “the afternoon,” but rather the evening.  I found my words for this article harder to write than I had anticipated.

I’ve struggled, as a Christian, for the past ten years or so with what seems to me to be an escalation of Christian persecution in our country, as well as persecution of others by Christians.  Difficult to define my emotions, I suppose I would say that it appears some sort of negative quid pro quo has been taking place…through the media, through various Christian groups, and recently through social networking groups.

I’ve been mortified at times by messages I see posted by those I know to be Christians on Facebook toward ethnic groups or minorities.  The same is true toward those who put forth a political view different from views held by those making the responses.  At the same time, I’ve seen a new pervasiveness in the media of cartoons making fun of Christian views, and political pundits turn downright nasty when making statements about Christian beliefs.  It’s been hard to see destruction, rather than common ground and relationship-building.

I recall one day I read a statement written by someone about an article discussing spirituality and the words were so incredibly harsh I began to cry.

But then I heard the story about a gentleman who had been an Al Qaeda operative, who when released from Guantanamo, went back to his homeland and rejoined the terrorists.  However, he changed his mind, turned them in and averted an explosion – thus saving lives.  I also read the Economist article I noted above.  I can see hope of shifts; I see various Christian groups (even some of our missionaries in our own church) joining hands with other religions including Muslims and making a difference in international communities.

I see these things and I am encouraged.  I also read these Bible verses and am encouraged as well:

14 Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. 15 Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. 16 Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position.[c] Do not be conceited.

17 Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. 18 If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. 19 Do not take revenge, my dear friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,”[d] says the Lord. 20 On the contrary:

“If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.”[e] (Meaning…you leave him/her to decide how to respond or think about the situation, not that you “Make” them feel guilty. – RDK)

21 Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good. ~ Romans 12:14-21

So I suppose that my Not-So-Silent Sunday thought for our normal “Simple Sabbath” message is this: Be gentle, be respectful, be compassionate, be loving…to all those you meet as best as you can.  A loving human is more powerful than anything else I’ve ever come in contact with…show your power this week, okay?

All the best, Red Dirt Kelly

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