All posts by Red Dirt Kelly

We have “Favorite Things” too…

October 18, 2010 Red Dirt Kelly 1 Comment

One of the iconic segments for Oprah’s show is her Favorite Things series – especially her Christmas show where the audience receives one of every product she reveals. Bloggers sometimes highlight various products because they’ve been asked to place products on their site for a particular promotion, or for a payment of some sort. Shows on T.V. highlight various products that work well and sometimes the public isn’t privy to whether or not it’s a “planted advertisement,” or if the product feature is a genuine information sharing gesture.

So, to clear this one up from the beginning, there is NO product support here. Our “Favorite Things” will have an indy bent. We’ll talk about a product or idea because we like it, and that’s the only reason.

I’m sharing one of my “favorite things” with you today because it took me a few years to finally hit a product that worked well for my coffee service. I used to take my favorite coffee beans, grind them daily, then add a bit of “Sugar in the Raw” turbinado sugar plus a little half-n-half once the coffee was brewed.

However, about a year ago I found these Roland imported demerara sugar rough cut cubes. I love them because sometimes I just want a hint of sweetness, and other times I want a bit more; there are various sizes and I really like that about them. I don’t have to fill my sugar bowl with the granular product only to wipe up spills, and these cubes lend a foodie flair when I have company that the loose sugar didn’t have. I purchased my box from the International Pantry gourmet shop in Norman, Oklahoma with a gift certificate given to me by my brother.

The International Pantry has been around since 1978 and is one of the few shops that feature a full line of Le Crueset cookware. I love the orange color and have plans to start trading out my 25 year-old cookware soon for a piece at a time.

What’s the difference between turbinado and demerara sugar? All brown sugars have some degree of molasses added to them, but the demerara is just a bit lighter, and is said to have less of a “honey” finish to it than the turbinado.

So, if you’re looking for a little something special to dress up your coffee service and love the warm flavor of demerara sugar over white sugar like I do, you might give these sugar cubes a try. I got mine for about $5.95 in the store, but you can also order them on Amazon for $4.50 plus shipping. My supply looks like it may last right at one year.

I love them!, Red Dirt Kelly

Oklahoma culture, Photography

Silent Sunday: 10/17/10

October 17, 2010 Red Dirt Kelly

Oklahoma Christian University Students experience "Out of This World" chapel service, enjoying almost a 30 minute feed from the space station. Click photo to visit the Edmond Sun website.

Screen shot 2010-10-16 at 8.02.45 PM — 6-0 OSU Cowboys now "Bowl eligible." Nice photo from the Daily Oklahoman. Click photo to read post-game report.

The mystery message. Red Dirt Kelly was walking across campus on 10-12-10 and spied this lone piece of paper randomly taped to a glass door. Upon closer inspection, she noted that there was a message, and some sort of insignia. The note read: "Forever blindly ill (sic) always wait thoughts (written in "of") you keep me up late." What did it mean? Who was it from? To whom was it directed? What did the bronze/gold metallic "M" symbol mean? ... Was it YOU?"

Sometimes Red Dirt Kelly sees things that give her ideas. This image gave her the idea that the Red Dirt Chronicles needed a company truck.

In November, 2009, Matt Mahan, his children and his brother-in-law were out digging for flint chips in the Dewey County area when his brother-in-law called them over to a bluff area he was working on. He had found "a dead guy," that ended up being a 200+ year-old skeleton. The medical examiner told them that based upon the femur size, the man could have been 6'6" or taller, and was probably not Native American. Have you ever just been digging around in the dirt and discovered a skeleton? It's almost Halloween, so we're publishing this photo now. We need to follow-up to see if a final report was filed by that M.E., and what the conclusions were.

ou iowa state — OU killed Iowa State. That's the whole story. Click the photo to get the perspective of an Iowa State blogger.

gracie burris — Gracie Burris, 5, gathers small pumpkins in the "Hide-a-Pumpkin" pit in Muskogee, OK. Photo by Wendy Burton of the Muskogee Phoenix.

RDC Mastheads

Line Dry

October 16, 2010 Red Dirt Kelly

Oklahoma culture, Reading Room

Heidi, Haystacks and Headaches: The Truth About Children’s Literature and Farm Life, Chapter 2

October 16, 2010 Red Dirt Kelly 4 Comments

As a child, I used to fantasize about being Heidi of the Alps. I used to draw pictures on my wide-ruled notebook paper of hovels on top of mountains with thatched roofs, the landscape dotted with fluffy yellow haystacks, goats, pine trees and snow. I used to pretend my bedroom was her attic bedroom where she could see the stars at night. And also, I used to have a literary crush on Peter, the goat-herder.

Heidi got me so hooked on “orphan” books that I couldn’t really get interested in much else for a while. There was Heidi, Anne of Green Gables, Mandy, The Secret Garden…all orphans, and all “me” in my head as I read through the pages over and over again. Oh, and I also had literary crushes on Dicken in the Secret Garden, AND on Gilbert in Anne of Green Gables.

Since the parents of Harriet the Spy weren’t around much in her books, I turned her into an orphan as well. Need you even ask if I had a crush on her friend Sport? And, since Wonaplei in the Island of the Blue Dolphins was stranded for eighteen years…yes, orphan. Every one of these female characters were “explorers” who pushed the boundaries of social acceptability with their adventures in one way or another. All of them were zealous, passionate about life, and most all of them had an emotional melt-down at some point. That’s where my story will begin today.

I think I was pretty awesome at having emotional melt-downs as a child. I know I was strong-willed. Had my parents only known to tell me to turn left when they wanted me to go right, jump if they wanted me to stand still, or scream bloody murder when they wanted me to be quiet…they might have thought their skills were magically blessed by the Early Childhood Fairy. I know that from time to time I would dig in with an idea, a rant, or some sort of decision that would turn in to quite the horn-locking situation. And, since we’re using “horn-locking” as a metaphor, I could probably take that even further and say that I was bull-headed. Strong willed, bull-headed, stubborn…pick one. They all fit.

In order for you to fully understand this little tale, it’s also important for you to know that I was a cartoon-lovin’ kid as well. Looney Tunes ruled. “Boy, I say BOY!…” I loved to imitate Foghorn Leghorn. And Ralph E. Wolfe and Sam Sheepdog: “Mornin’, Ralph.” “Mornin’, Sam.” And, I loved cartoon paraphernalia. For example, that cool anvil that always showed up to give the character’s heads a few knots? Nice! Or “ACME” everything. And, I used to love the fact that cartoon haystacks were so versatile. Looney Tunes did a great job with their cartoon haystacks. For instance, Wile E. Coyote could pick up an entire haystack within which he was hiding, run with his fingers across a road (cue the upper register piano keys sound effects), and then set the haystack back down again…over and over until he reached his destination. Haystacks were also good for breaking falls. Usually, the “good” cartoon would fall out of an airplane or off a cliff and land on a nice fluffy haystack, while the “bad” character would land on the dirt right beside them. And then, of course, dynamite would blow up in case the fall didn’t kill them.

One summer day my penchant for fantasizing about orphan protagonists, my bull-headedness and images of cartoon haystacks all came together into one knock-down, drag-out argument with my mother. I’m sure I was highly invested in defending my position to the death, and I’m sure she was thinking that perhaps she had spawned a freak of nature who needed a calf-tranquilizer. The verbal tennis-match we were having was Wimbledon worthy. So, I decided to one-up the situation, not by pleading my case with different words or more emphatic body language, but by ending the argument. I decided I would “run emotionally away from the scene of this persecution,” therefore garnering sympathy and attention. I was a literary orphan and this was my moment.

I turned around, ran out of the kitchen and through the garage, pushed the back door open and took off across the back yard toward (um…stop for a second, look around, pick a target…) The BARN! Caught up in my “persecution” leading role I thought quickly, “I’ll go throw myself on a haystack and cry violently!” My pace picked up, and before I knew it I was in the barn, climbing the stack of baled prairie grass, mixed with a few bales of alfalfa. The first level of the haystack wasn’t enough for dramatic effect. I was going all the way to the top. I grabbed a hay hook, used it for an anchor as I threw myself over the second and third layer of hay, and then finally pulled myself up and over the top row.

Adrenaline is a funny thing. Had I not been so worked up, I would have realized that as I was crawling across the highest layer of hay bales, my knees were receiving pain messages. The hay was tough and scratchy, more like crawling on cedar chips than the bright yellow cartoon hay image I had in my head. I quickly sighted the center, perfect for my dramatic “throw down and cry” scene, heaved my body forward and slammed my head down with a wail. The impact of my face onto the tightly baled hay might as well have been that of me slamming into a pine tree on Heidi’s mountain; it was solid as a rock. “Ouch!” I yelled, the shock and awe reverberating through my entire head.

Previously I had planned on forcing myself to fake-cry really loudly in order to punctuate the scene with the proper je ne sais quoi. Mustering fake blubber was no longer needed, however, as tears flowed easily from the very real physical stinging of my face. Wow, this haystack wasn’t yellow, it wasn’t fluffy and it sure as heck wasn’t something I could cry myself to sleep into; I wasn’t even sleepy. However, the bull-headedness didn’t get suddenly knocked out of me just because I had given myself a hay-concussion. I decided to TRY and cry myself to sleep just to make whatever point I was trying to make. I suppose on some level I succeeded because I ended up taking a short nap, but it took a lot longer to fall asleep than in the movies.

I woke up a little while later and was immediately reminded of two things: a) I had actually run out of the house away from one of my parents and could be facing very real consequences for said action; and, b) my head hurt like the dickens. Not Dicken, my literary crush from the Secret Garden, but “The Dickens” – the voluminous, overwhelming adjective used for special occasions to emphasize a great amount of “whatever.” At that point, it was my headache. Head throbbing, ego-bruised and curiosity peaked as to what my punishment might be for running out of the house, I made my way down that wretched haystack.

When I opened the door back into the house, however, my mother’s face showed genuine concern. “Kelly, are you okay?” she asked. “What happened to your face?” I could hear the worry in her voice. Okay, I HAD been gone for probably 45 minutes to an hour. There was no mention of the family court-hearing that would be taking place in our living room to hand down my sentence for leaving home. The “judge” just looked worried; perhaps my face looked quite a mess and she thought I had already paid some sort of price for my actions.

Maybe being an orphan wasn’t all that it was cracked up to be. I closed the door and came on into the house, sat down and began to eat a pretty good meal that was waiting on me. As I worked through my sandwich, my right cheek throbbed. The first genuine tear of emotion trickled down my cheek. “Haystacks are not soft,” I thought. “Goat cheese probably isn’t as good as this sandwich,” I continued to talk myself down off the Alps and back to my farm in Tuttle, Oklahoma. It didn’t take long. The comfortable sounds of the kitchen soothed me as I finished my meal and headed back to my room. I glanced at my bookshelf and spied the Heidi book. I hesitated, turned back around and went to help my mom clean the dishes.

Oklahoma culture

RDC Friday Morning Shout Out: To Our Neighbors Rebuilding Without Government Aid

October 15, 2010 Red Dirt Kelly 1 Comment

Screen shot 2010-10-14 at 7.50.59 PM — Click photo to read a report from the GovMonitor re: the denial of Oklahoma's flood aid claim.

While floods have devastated areas around the world and within the U.S., recently Red Dirt country sustained a fairly damaging flood as well. This particular phenomenon was coined by weather experts as a “500-year rain.” In other words, we’ll probably not see one like it again. To add to the burden, although the majority of the damage was sustained in areas not zoned as “flood plain,” the White House denied Governor Henry’s request for aid to those who sustained property damage.

This denial was a difficult blow to absorb. Areas of Northwest Oklahoma City and Edmond were damaged, as well as throughout the metropolitan area. We’re not going to include shock video or photos on our blog, but suffice it to say there were highly emotional moments. During one instance, a young girl was almost lost in the deep waters several times before emerging one last time to be pulled to safety by rescuers. Another story included the testimony of an adolescent boy holding his paraplegic grandmother above the water for six hours before being rescued. Horses and cattle were lost, farms were devastated, and houses sustained an inordinate amount of damage. Some were irreparable.

But, just like those around the world and across the U.S., the commitment to rebuild has flourished and progress is being made regardless of financial assistance. The progress is possibly slower due to the lack of resources, but it’s certainly no less determined. There are hundreds of stories of progress across the area, many much more extreme than we’ll share here. We have three small vignettes for you, however…slices of rebuilding taking place.

So, today the RDC Friday Morning Shout Out simply goes to all those who are making progress, whatever the pace may be. And certainly to those who are still planning progress but for some reason haven’t yet begun.

1) One fun little story comes from Dane and Diane Sharp. They live just down the road from me. For kicks one Halloween, they made big “eyes” and nailed them onto a dead tree in their yard. The flooding was so high in their area that the eyes were swept away, never to be “seen” again. The Sharps have since replaced the eyes and now drivers-by can smile at the local “Googly Eyed-Tree.”

Googly Eyes are Back in Action! "Eye Level" is about 4.5 to 5 feet, where the water had risen and swept them away.

2) Our second story is about Cody and Andrea Freeman. They had just purchased a home that had been vacant and left uncompleted for approximately five years. Determined to finish the project out for their family, they went through all the steps to take ownership of the home and moved in. They had JUST settled in when the flood hit. Standing on their porch, they watched these waters rage onto their brand new property (see below – photos are post flooding). The waters have recessed, there was some “re-clean-up” to perform, but they’re doing okay.

flood photo — The area on the left that looks like a flooded section is actually a creek. The water is over the top of the bank.

3) Our last neighbor’s property was extremely damaged. He lost horses down a flooded creek, lost fencing around his horse farm, and had extensive mud dumping across his quarter-section of land. Here is a cell phone photo of their property after the water subsided. You can tell by the vegetation that the water reached nearly to the top of their fence posts.

horse farm before — Horse farm, after the water subsided.

I stopped by to see them the other day and check on their progress. The dogs greeted me, but they weren’t home. There is a new fence, however, on one side of their property. There are at least two horses back at their home now. A large area of mud dredging has been grated and it looks like they’re getting ready to start on the next section. Good luck, Mr. Horse Farmer Neighbor…good luck, bridge builders and dry wall fixers. And good luck to everyone who was affected by the flood and are rebuilding regardless of the lack of federal disaster assistance. We’re proud you are our neighbors and wish you the best!

Two of the four dogs who were happy to show me the progress their owner was making on his horse farm.

As the sun sets, you can see the new fence on the right and piles of mud grated to clear the drive on the left.

Mud cleared, and the next section is ready for a fence. — Cleared area number two - ready for the next section of new fencing.

Foodie Page, Oklahoma culture

…And That’s the News in Red Dirt Country

October 13, 2010 Red Dirt Kelly 8 Comments

Last year during one of my “Human Sexuality and the Family” lectures, the students happened upon some information in our textbook they found especially intriguing. Evidently, there was a study cited examining why those our society deems as “attractive” women might choose to marry (again, what our society deems as) “unattractive” men. The debate heated up when pop culture examples were named by various class members. I think Woody Allen and former wife Mia Farrow were one illustration used as evidence to make their point. Okay, I could sort of see their reasoning on that one:

NPG x126154,Woody Allen; Mia Farrow,by Terry O'Neill — Woody Allen and former wife Mia Farrow. Photo from the National Portrait Gallery. Click to visit their website.

But then, they hit me where it hurt. They actually brought up the name of Garrison Keillor and his wife.

I’m sorry, but at that point they had trodden upon my sacred ground. Seriously, Keillor is one of my literary gods. Only a genius could write statements like:

“Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a purpose.”

And even though I like cats, I wailed away about the beauty of his voice, his humor and his written word. They didn’t care…and I probably lost the argument. My students are excellent debaters. But as I began reviewing my Facebook page this morning (this was very early, pre-earthquake time), I began thinking about Keillor again because one particular comment caught my eye. I thought, “Okahoma is like Lake Wobegon, only – – it’s not fiction.” I then decided that perhaps I should occasionally write up a “news report” of sorts in the Red Dirt Chronicles. True stories. So, I’m starting now. And although I can only deign to approach the outskirts of Garrison Keillor’s shadow when it comes to wielding my proverbial pen, I believe I can count on our fair community to make up for what my writing loses.

Volume 1; Taxidermy and Interior Design: Domestic and Industrial

The Cherokee Hills “middle-aged plus a few years” Sunday school group drove to Meers, Oklahoma this past weekend to enjoy a scenic journey and eat a meal together at the famous Meers Store and Restaurant. Jim and Cina Gailey decided to drive separately because their shiny red T-Bird was well suited for this sort of thing.

Jim and Cina, preparing to load out for their Meers trip.

But then Jim decided he was tired of driving, having already done that quite a bit earlier in the week. So they unloaded the car, and jumped in with the rest of the crew. 90 minutes later the entire entourage was standing in line, admiring the landscape and general beauty of the hamburger establishment.

meers-728145 — I have no credit for this photo. I stole it off the internet blatently. Okay, yes I do. Click the photo to visit the blogger who took a better picture than me.

Once inside, everyone had an enjoyable time ordering – laughing, joking and generally enjoying every minute of their outing thus far.

Their laughter died down, if only temporarily however, when they looked up and saw what hovered above them menacingly, as if to say, “Mess with me and I’ll drop the whole load on your plate.” Yes, the covered-in-dust ceiling fan became quite the target of concern at that point. Is dust bacteria-ridden? How much has to fall into your food before you should actually begin worrying? These questions and more haunted at least one or two of the more cleanliness-occupied Sunday-schoolers.

It wasn’t long, however, before the attention-limited group found another focus. Mr. Deer was hanging on the wall above the party to their left, and he also needed a good dusting.

: “Dusty,” the ten-point wonder buck. Oh, and for those of you outside of Red Dirt Country, those hooves below are a gun rack.

Ah, poor Dusty. He looked much older than his years because layers of dust had been accumulating for ages on his whiskers, nose and face. Just about the time everyone’s stomach was churning over the sight, however, the food arrived. And just for the record, there is a reason why people keep going back to that joint in droves, in spite of any fossilizing dust accumulation.

Smoked chicken dredged in BBQ sauce with a side of fried green tomatoes.

The Meers Burger, already half eaten by the time the camera focused.

While the group was eating, they were entertained with the fine art selection hanging on the walls. Notice the dusty frame and even the dusty slatted wood? The interior design theme of “Dust O’ Plenty” was consistent throughout the entire venue!

But the fun had to end at some point. Here is evidence of the fact that the food really is quite amazing…

: “Burp.”

On the way home, Red Dirt Kelly graciously kept her husband’s full attention by taking no less than thirty or forty shots of the wind turbine farm just west of the restaurant.

They all look like this, folks. Every single one of them.

Later that week, a local Realtor posted a Facebook message asking her friends whether or not she should “…leave the mounted deer heads on the wall when staging her new listing to be sold, or take them down?” Several chimed in about the virtues of taxidermic interior design. Others wondered if perhaps the prospective buyers might be put off by the sight, just in case the deer in the home was bigger than that shot by them looking at the house. It might not be appropriate to demean their hunting skills right off the bat. Red Dirt Kelly, of course, chimed in about the virtues of dusting the deer heads, whether or not they were left up or taken down. The Realtor assured her they were well dusted and looked great. Appeased, Kelly sighed with relief and signed off until the next day.

When she signed back on this morning, however, she was met with another quandary posted by the same Realtor. Here’s the text of the actual post:

so I am about to do a preforeclosure inspection and house is stil occupied and he is a cop so if I carry I have to disclose it. figure that sets a bad tone. I guess if I am not on fb in an hour…it didn’t go well.

For those of you outside Red Dirt Country, “carry” means “gun.” I’m not sure how our gun-packin’ Realtor came out on that deal, but if I find out I’ll let you know.

In other news, a 4.5 earthquake shook the Red Dirt in our heartland today. Hordes of citizens immediately took to the Twitter air waves and began sharing their, “I was doing THIS when the 7.5 quake hit!” banter. Jokes were made about Gary England watching the quake on Doppler radar, and about the fact that Hefner Lake condos were evacuated as a preventative measure against a catastrophic Tsunami.

Then the Tweets died down, the people resumed their daily goings on, and that’s about all the news in Red Dirt Country this week.

Stay safe, dust your deer, and we’ll see you next time. Y’all come back now, ya hear?

(“Tweet verbiage” from TheLostOgle.Com)

Oklahoma culture, Relationships

We’re All Human Beans; Let’s Find Common Grounds

October 12, 2010 Red Dirt Kelly 4 Comments

Sometimes I think a blogger has to be vulnerable with their community in order for important messages to resonate. That’s why today’s “Relationships” post includes a personal story. Two of them.

When I was bullied

I grew up in a fairly rural community surrounded by independent and small farms. I can always recall the year of any grade level during my youth because I was in kindergarten (grade “zero”) in 1970. Life was fairly stable and slow-paced during my early childhood. The definitions of the community I knew as a youngster were changed, however, when the social breezes turned into troubled storms.

Desegregation busing was in full swing by 1974 and my hometown was close enough to Oklahoma’s largest metropolitan school districts to become a haven for what has become known over the years as white flight. I can’t blame any family or individual for how they reacted to change. People are scared of what they don’t know. I can say, however, that I was affected by the change in our own community. There was an influx of “city kids” into our country town, and with that change in our landscape came some challenges for both populations.

I experienced new emotions, unfamiliar to me until that time period in my life. I was met with students who were socialized differently, whose wardrobes were by and large purchased from department stores, and whose houses were larger with more amenities than the previous norm. I’m sure the incoming students were met with challenges as well. They had moved into a new town with new rules; it must have been difficult for them. I know it was for me.

I frequently became the recipient of comments about my hand-me-downs, about my hair cut, and about the way I talked. New “street smart” lingo was wielded like weaponry in the halls and my wounds got deeper as the weeks passed. In hind sight, I can now see that much of the behavior I encountered was a form of bullying. Unfortunately, my response to this was to become a bully. I’ll never forget one day on our playground in either the sixth or seventh grade. I had worked hard to gain the acceptance of some of the newer kids and seemed to finally be making some headway.

When I became a bully

Standing with the group, their attention turned toward a weaker individual in our class. She was socially less skilled and struggled with grades. The group began taunting her and I joined in. I was now the bully, not the one being bullied. At some point she began shouting back, and in an attempt to protect my new status as a cooler kid, I stepped toward her and pushed her backwards. I must have pushed pretty hard because she fell to the ground. What’s worse, she tried to get up once and I pushed her backwards again. She stayed put the second time. Those who I stood with began to laugh at her and call her names. My face flushed…this girl was a “country kid” and I had just hurt one of my own.

Over twenty years later I tracked her down and apologized for that day. The guilt from my physical aggression weighed heavily on me and I needed to make amends. Interestingly, she didn’t even remember that day or what happened. So, the act of reconciliation was basically for my own healing I suppose. I’m sharing this illustration with you because “bullying” seems to be in the air on the national news, we continue to have bullying problems and Safe Schools programming challenges here in Oklahoma, and bullying is a social problem that happens across races, cultures, social classes…and even within our family trees.

As I watched a few of the “It Gets Better” videos this past week, I was reminded that human beings respond to their own pain many times by taking it out on others. The thing is, though, those they take it out on are human beings too. They were born, they have some form of a family most of the time, and…they have feelings and hopes and dreams. Just like you. Just like me.

So today my message for you is this: Whether you are being bullied or are the bully, try to step back, take a fresh look, and find common ground if possible. If you can’t stop hurting people, there is help. We’ll help you find some at the RDC if you don’t know where to look. If you are scared and hurting because people can’t stop hurting you – same thing. Everyone is valuable and you’re no exception.

We’re “human beans”…so let’s find some “common grounds.”

I’m going to get a cup of coffee now…Ciao.

Oklahoma culture, Photography

Silent Sundays: 10/10/10

October 10, 2010 Red Dirt Kelly

seventh street — Seeing an opportunity to influence change, "Sassy" posted photos of delapidated properties and eyesore lots on the Sayre, OK city newspaper website. I wonder if "Sassy" will get some municipal clean-up action in his/her town now? Click photo to visit website and see a few other shots of areas needing attention.

prayer circle — Grief, loss...and community: In a powerful demonstration of support and faith, friends and family of Leslie Joy Evans pray outside her hospital. Leslie was a friend of local college grads and many in the Norman/OKC metro area. She and her premature twin babies died during a difficult pregnancy challenge. You can visit the memorial site and blog her family created by clicking this photo. May peace and comfort find her husband and extended family.

Ry at Ludivine — Rylee Roberts, a contributing photographer for the RDC, dines at Ludivine Restaurant in Mid-Town OKC on 10/9/10. The establishment opened this week after much planning and preparation, and features a rotating menu of available foods most all from local growers and producers. A "full color" review of the new restaurant coming later this week. Click photo to visit their website.

Conked out. Mid-semester is always rough and this one is no exception. A student takes a study break and naps in the Edmon Low Library on the OSU campus in Stillwater, 10/6/10.

pink boots — Pink boots. The nation "thinks pink" this month, as Breast Cancer Awareness Week takes place. RDC Homestead and Garden author, Julie Allgyer, made sure those around her were thinking pink as well. Click photo for more information about Breast Cancer Awareness Month.

Sometimes Red Dirt Kelly turns into driveways with "Estate Sale" signs posted by the road. She usually doesn't buy anything, but she frequently takes photos of cool old treasures. Here's a Maytag Washer that was for sale, listed at $200. "But (they'd) take $50 for it..."

10-10-10 — I wonder if Suzy Welch is reading her book today? If I were her, I'd do SOMETHING to commemorate the volume. This edition was the only random thing I could find named for today's date...a perfect "10."

RDC Mastheads

Early Autumn Nap

October 9, 2010 Red Dirt Kelly

Oklahoma culture, Travel, Uncategorized

Friday Morning Shoutout 10/8/10: The Oklahoma Historical Society & History Center

October 8, 2010 Red Dirt Kelly

ohc_exterior_night — Oklahoma History Center (OHC) at Night - images provided by the OHC

One of the more recent precious jewels in Oklahoma’s crown has been the addition of the Oklahoma History Center, supported by the continued development and dedication of the Oklahoma Historical Society and their community stakeholders.

Last night I spent 30 minutes exploring their website. The first five minutes were used to review their current and upcoming events for October; I got overwhelmed…so much to do, so many choices! Then a blog hyperlink caught my eye. Well, I was “done for” at that point. I read three or four posts. Okay I read five, commented on all of them like an overzealous cheerleader, then told myself “Stop! It will be there tomorrow, and even the next day!”

I do hope you’ll visit their facility very soon, either to look through their exhibits or attend an event held in the beautiful building. And, if you ever have a chance to hear Director Dr. Bob Blackburn speak, my recommendation would be to drop your other calendared commitments and choose him. The guy knows his stuff, he’s really approachable and is a true teacher and scholar. Maybe I should have just written this shout out for him…yea, Dr. Blackburn!

mary-buffalo-small-2530 — "Tipi With Battle Pictures" - OHC Blog Photo, Authored by Matt Reed

However, there is much more than Dr. Blackburn’s speaking to enjoy. October is “Family History Month,” with new events, contests and news being posted every day. Check out their events calendar by clicking here.

The Center, the Society and all those involved who helped build what we now enjoy are to be commended…and for your efforts, you ALL get our RDC Friday Morning Shout Out.

Thanks for the good work, Red Dirt Kelly

atrium_winnie_mae — "Winnie Mae" Atrium at the OHC - Photo provided by the OHC

Foodie Page, Oklahoma culture

Ludivine is Open and the Operation is Lookin’ Fine…Plus, Big Truck Tacos Saves the Day

October 6, 2010 Red Dirt Kelly 1 Comment

Last night my hubby and I decided to go enjoy the festivities of Ludivine’s maiden voyage, their first night with doors open to the public. Here’s the sunset I enjoyed on the drive from work…

7:35 p.m., prairie view approximately 10 miles west of Meridian, OK

When I got to the house, Mick was dressed and ready to go. He looked up the address one final time (805 N. Hudson) while I brushed my teeth and sprayed on perfume. When we pulled up to the restaurant it was already dark, and most of the parallel spaces along the street were taken. “Good,” I thought. “A nice crowd even though it’s after 8:00 p.m.” Here are a couple shots from the street view…

As we entered the restaurant, I noticed the staff were busy, friendly and everyone seemed to have at least two tasks on which they were focusing. The front-end manager greeted us and told us that there was approximately an hour wait. I looked around the house and saw every table full but one. She offered to have us wait in their “great bar” but I knew what our answer would be. Mick gets up at 4:00 a.m. and staying out this late was already a stretch. She suggested coming early to lessen the wait; they open at 5:00 p.m. I agreed, told her we would be back and we prepared to go somewhere else. I wasn’t discouraged at all – in fact I was happy that their opening night provided them with a full house.

Before I left, I took a few shots of the dining, kitchen and bar areas – and one of the table general manager Tracey Leird was setting for their next guests. I commented on their flowers and she mentioned that they, too, were grown in Oklahoma. “Perfect,” I thought.

So, we headed down the road and pulled into another place near to our heart: Big Truck Tacos. I cannot get enough of their ceviche.

I’m glad Ludivine had a good first night. I’m glad I learned when to show up in order to get a table more quickly, and I’m glad that another strong business model has found it’s way to the heart of Oklahoma City. Oh…I’m ALSO glad Big Truck Tacos is there to make our tummies happy! – Red Dirt Kelly

(A few shots of Big Truck Tacos in case you’ve not yet graced their establishment. And if you’ve not…get on down there!)

Oklahoma culture, Relationships

Hubby, Me & The Pioneer Woman: Our Sordid 24 Hour Triangle Issue

October 5, 2010 Red Dirt Kelly 3 Comments

Five weeks ago, I passed a friend of mine in the hall. I treasure this friend because she’s one of those laid back, Oklahoma women who looks you square in the eye when talking with you. She rolls with the punches, she has an air of confidence and she gets cooler every year I know her. She greeted me: “Hey, I’ve enjoyed reading your blog! Who knows…you could be another Pioneer Woman!”

pioneer woman blog — CLICK PHOTO TO VISIT THE PIONEER WOMAN BLOG

First of all, my friend just got even cooler because she had right then and there provided tangible evidence that someone other than my family members were reading our posts. And second of all, who was the Pioneer Woman? Two more weeks passed before I thought, “Oh yeah…I need to check out this Pioneer Woman blog.” Or, should I have thought, “Sensation!?” As soon as I pulled up her site late one evening I became hooked for so many reasons. First, the Okie Factor was major. Second, the context about which she wrote reminded me of multiple reasons I loved Oklahoma country life. Her photography was wonderful, her food looked sinful, her children were darling, her husband was hunky and the sunsets across her pond were even redder than those I see when driving home. Within an hour, The Pioneer Woman had wrapped her blog around my heart.

Before I closed out the site I noticed she had written a autobiographical series entitled “From Black Heels to Tractor Wheels (BHTW),” about her decision to ditch law school and marry an Oklahoma cattle rancher. I didn’t even start those posts; I needed sleep. Flash forward a few more weeks…

Earlier today I introduced you to my new love, the iPad. Last night I began the BHTW series and seriously tested the battery, streaming/loading and sheer determination capacity of my new technological wonder. I began the series at 7:45 p.m. and finished at 1:38 a.m. I took a few breaks along the way. At one point I cooked myself the worst dinner I’ve made in several years…but that’s a different story. And, at several points during the evening my husband came into the living room and began talking to me. He told me a story about his day, he asked me a few questions about something, and came in to tell me goodnight.

At no time during any of these interactions did my brain engage what he was saying. I was thinking in my head, “Look intently into his eyes, nod and hurry him along so I can get back to the next entry in my beloved BHTW series.” The Pioneer Woman was tightly wedged between me and my husband. I was putting my relationship with her stories above him, and was so hooked I couldn’t even see it…I was in way too deep. I just wanted answers to all the questions I had about “What might happen next!??” to the Pioneer Woman and her Marlboro Man.

6:04 a.m. was an unwelcome time for me this morning. The alarm on my cell phone did its job and I took way to long to find the cancel button. I usually get up early and blog if it’s my day to contribute. “Tuesdays – TwosDays – Relationships…” I thought. Meh. I got ready for work, ignored the post writing (read: avoided the relationships section by writing about my new iPad), had a few meetings, and took a very late lunch. The first thing I did was call my husband: “Hey there, I’d like to go out to dinner tonight. Ludivine is opening and I want to eat their food.”

After he came to grips with the fact that he probably could NOT wear his khaki shorts and a sweatshirt, he agreed. “I’ll call Rylee and tell her we’re going on a date. And that she needs to manage dinner on her own,” he told me as he hung up.

I love my husband. The Pioneer Woman was no longer between us. She was somewhere in the room, but Mick and I were back to our interdependent state once again, standing side by side. “P-Dub” (Pioneer Woman reference for herself) is no longer causing distance between us, or deafness and blindness on my part.

Okay, now for the serious stuff. Triangles are tricky and very powerful dynamics. They basically exist when something comes between, or diverts, a healthy relationship between two people. The “third party” can be a person (any person – young or old), a thing…oh, say…like a blog, a substance being abused (drugs, alcohol, pornography, gambling, eating, etc.) or even something that might normally seem healthy – like a work out regimen. If you can see three elements in your relationship, and in general two of them are close, two of them are distant, and two of them are conflicted, then you’re probably in a triangle.

So my thought for you today is to examine the close relationships in your life and see if there’s extra baggage in your important dyads (two person relationships) that needs to be trimmed. If you find some, take that baggage and put it where it belongs. We keep real luggage on the top shelf of our closet. I put my marital baggage back at this address where it belongs: @ http://thepioneerwoman.com/

and…I’ll visit when I can. But if Mick asks me a question, I’ll put my new iPad screen on blank and really listen. He deserves it, and I’m pretty sure P-Dub wouldn’t want it any other way.

Good luck!

Oklahoma culture, Photography

Okies in Ecuador: “It’s a Wrap.”

October 5, 2010 Red Dirt Kelly

You might have noticed that when visiting the RDC Travel page, there is a photo at the bottom referencing a series called “Okies in Ecuador.” This blog created for the NewsOK Travel section was written and produced by my brother, Quentin Bomgardner, and illustrated with photos by he and my two daughters, Rachel and Rylee Roberts.

The format of the NewsOK site isn’t conducive to easy navigation. Therefore, “Q” created a web page where you can now begin on Day 1, travel with them through the end of their journey on Day 14, plus review a few extra photograph collections and sound file entries covering their experiences.

As a mother of the girls who traveled, I enjoyed reviewing all this work because I’ll never get that kind of detail in the living room at night…and the girls are pretty decent about sharing stories. As a sister, I was excited for the girls to take their first big excursion away from home with their uncle. And as a reader, I felt like I got a very good view of a place I’ve never visited. An excellent view. Now I might want to go myself!

Thanks Quentin, Rachel and Rylee…loved the journey, and love that I can revisit through this series any time I wish.

Red Dirt Kelly

Click the banana photo to visit an indexed page where you can start their journey from the beginning.

Bananas grow UP - Ecuador, 2010. Photo by Rylee Roberts.

Reading Room

Hello, handsome. Thanks for protecting my peepers.

October 5, 2010 Red Dirt Kelly

Before I met you I would keep a bottle of TheraTears on my desk and nightstand. Dry, bloodshot eyes were a daily reminder that too much of my work was done while staring at a less-than-optimal screen.

Before I met you, I could usually read only one 20-35 page .pdf formatted research article online. The remainder of my homework or files for my own research I would have to print off, killing forests. And yes, I meant to type the plural form of that word. Today I read 92 pages in a row…not one eye drop.

Before I met you, I would have to review information online using my whopping 6.7 pound Dell Latitude laptop. I still love you dear laptop, but only for working, processing thousands of words or hundreds of thousands of variables. I have another love for surfing and e-reading now.

And before I met you, I was still just a wee bit Apple shy. I was still walking on the proverbial format fence wondering which product was my favorite for writing down my daily thoughts in Red Dirt Chronicles blog.

Not any more. You, my dear iPad, have changed all that. And for having you in my life now – I am very, very grateful.

iKisses and iHugs,

Red Dirt Kelly

Oklahoma culture, Photography

Silent Sundays: 10/3/2010

October 3, 2010 Red Dirt Kelly

chickasaw renaissance — "Chickasaw Renaissance" by Phillip Carroll Morgan. Introduction by Bill Anoatubby, Chickasaw Nation Governor. This book was one of three titles revealed at the Chickasaw Annual Meeting and Festival held Oct. 2nd. Click photo for more information.

Mother wolf spider — Saturday morning, October 2nd: Alice Woodrome took this photo of a mother wolf spider with hundreds of new babies on her back. Alice is a gardner in NW OKC. The wolf spider resides there with her other flowers.

This OSU Cowboy fan didn't give her arm for a win, she used her leg! Caught up in the hoopla of the crazy OSU v A&M Thursday night contest, this good natured fan took her prosthetic leg off and waved it around, cheering all the while. You gotta love the football fans in Oklahoma! - Photo by Jani Hays.

The weather broke in Oklahoma, and Wednesday morning, Sept. 29th I drove by pasture land after pasture land, all with farm ponds and fog rising from the surface. Beautiful! - Photo by Red Dirt Kelly

That same night, we were treated to another Big Sky show. Hey, Fall, welcome to Oklahoma! - Photo by Red Dirt Kelly

Screen shot 2010-10-02 at 8.55.19 PM — You didn't think we were gonna finish Silent Sunday without a Red River Rivalry shot, did you? Click photo to visit CrimsonAndCream blog for OU/Texas slideshow...

RDC Mastheads

1925 Model T, C-Cab One Ton Truck

October 2, 2010 Red Dirt Kelly

Oklahoma culture

“Super Cool”: The OSU v A&M Fan Who Got it Right

October 1, 2010 Red Dirt Kelly 4 Comments

Last night’s football game between the Oklahoma State Cowboys and the Texas A & M Aggies was bizarre. It was mayhem. The players and the fans alike, on both sides, went through an emotional roller coaster and the ride ended somewhere in the Tricky Hall of Mirrors…people were still reaching out to test reality as they led themselves out of the stadium. Confused, elated, exhausted…or in the Aggies’ case, beaten. And in the Cowboys’ case – at least this time – celebrating.

As I was riding home last night I started thinking about the superheros who contributed to the OSU win. I think the tuba section in the band gets at least one vote; they took the Three Dog Night hit, Never Been to Spain (You know… “I’ve never been to heaven, but I’ve been to Oklahoma; Oh they tell me I was born there…), two extra verses during a national TV timeout and had most everyone in the audience singing along by the time they finished.

The players get three votes. One lost the rest of the season to a knee injury. One played on no sleep because his baby girl was in the hospital the night before. The defense probably gets four votes because they played against 106 snaps…the game was an extra-long grueling mess for those boys. But this morning, when I think back to what helped me get through the game, five personal votes go to the kid in the orange cape.

I’ve seen him there before. He’s the kid who sends his eyeglasses into all sorts of contortions by sticking both fingers in his ears when Pistol Pete shoots his shotgun before the game. Obviously he doesn’t like loud noises. But last night I think he saved my husband from at least two cases of hyperventilation and possibly one cardiac arrest by just doing what he did all night long. The kid pretend-flew. He twirled around and around. And around some more. Sometimes he leaned over the handrails and actually watched the game. And, he ran up and down the stairs so that his cape would go flying behind him like a big orange banner.

The kid was Super Cool.

Nothing phased him. And he completely distracted the convulsing adult fan base at just the right times. Last night he was my hero, and this morning I’m giving him my Friday morning post.

Here’s to you, Super Cool. May the wind beneath your cape take you around your pretend world over and over again.

Faith

Gianna Jessen, The Book of John & Faith Wednesday

September 29, 2010 Red Dirt Kelly

I love that we have wireless at my place of employment, AND that I can take a quiet moment when eating lunch. I’m using this time to share my quiet moments of thought I had early this morning. Thoughts that are still with me six hours later.

1) The Gianna Jessen video from 2008 is an interesting opportunity to revisit your views about life, death, politics and values. Speaking in Queen’s Hall of the Parliament House, her message is delivered to an audience representing great diversity. A message representing one voice, standing for many others. If you’ve not seen the piece, I would recommend it for several reasons…One of which I address in my “second lunch-time point.” I chose to share this link because it’s her 16 min. speech in full, but will require a Facebook account to view. You can search for the video easily in two parts on your internet browser if you avoid FB…

2) My second thought is this. Regardless of what you believe, where you fall on this issue, or how you personally wrestle with feelings on one side of the line or the other, I would encourage you to embrace all human beings and think about loving them…without attributing a “sin” or behavior toward rationalizing how things are…or aren’t.

I was reading from John 9 this morning, and was thinking about how many clients I see in my office who struggle with the sins of their parents, or grandparents, or other family members. Much of this “sin” is simply their family members’ inability to understand the consequence of their actions…or ability to empathize due to their own damage or pain. Many clients feel they are being greatly punished for the sins or consequences of their family history. Their pain is very real.

However, my message to you, the public, on this Faith Wednesday is this: Turn these thoughts around, and think about the OPPORTUNITY your struggles or setbacks provide you to live out your faith, and glorify Him who you call Father. Gianna Jessen does. I try to. Thousands of heroes and heroines do across the world every day.

Yes, this is a Christian message. But it holds for people who have other faiths as well. Or, for those without a faith to call their own. Good luck, today, taking up the opportunity you have been given…with whatever struggles you are bearing…to use it to glorify and spread a positive message for your Savior. For your faith. And/OR, for the good of those around you.

Take care, Red Dirt Kelly

¹As he went along, he saw a man blind from birth. ²His disciples asked him, “Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?”

³“Neither this man nor his parents sinned,” said Jesus, “but this happened so that the work of God might be displayed in his life. ⁴As long as it is day, we must do the work of him who sent me. Night is coming, when no one can work. ⁵While I am in the world, I am the light of the world.” John 9: 1-5

Relationships

The Roach Motel has an Emergency Exit

September 28, 2010 Red Dirt Kelly

I sat in the dark, staring up at the aging, Jewish researcher sporting his yarmulke and hunkering over the lectern on stage. He had the rapt attention of 3,500 marriage and family therapists as he intertwined his lifetime of research, vulnerable and human stories of his own marriage, and a joke here or there. John Gottman was on a roll.

I had heard most of his speech before, but noticed that his personal examples were getting more poignant. He had peeled back a few layers of caution; a nice trait you rarely see in addresses to such large audiences. I was about to lean over to my colleague, Suzanne, for the twentieth time (we had been whispering back and forth, making those “aww” noises when he would say something heartfelt…you know, the classic therapist speaker-interaction behavior), when Gottman’s words stopped me. He was saying, “You know…getting into one of those really crazy intense conflicts with a partner is like checking into a roach motel.”

I forgot what I was going to whisper to Suzanne and began to search frantically for my Blackberry instead. Digging around in my purse proved rather noisy and I received three “shame-on-you” glares by the time I found the thing. I didn’t care. The Memo Pad on my phone needed a notation. I pulled up my “Relationship” file and typed in: “Negative conflictual escalation like a roach motel…check in, but can’t check out…runnin, dark, worst selves”

The fact that I correctly typed all words but “running” in the dark on that tiny keypad pleasantly surprised me. I hit “save” and turned my attention back to the spotlighted man on stage. He was already into something else cool and I had missed half of the lead-in. I decided not to ask Suzanne to catch me up lest I receive more glares from those around me.

I made six more notes before the speech ended, but my mind kept jumping back to the Roach Motel metaphor. It was true. Roaches follow the bait into a place they really shouldn’t go. They can’t get out and really have no idea how they got there in the first place. They enter quickly, into a dark and sticky place and become immobilized. Stuck there with the others who did the same thing. Not a pretty sight.

Couples do this. People do this. Someone drops the “bait,” another begins to follow the trail and before they know it they’re both stuck in dark and sticky fight they can’t leave. Once those involved engage in a negative and escalating sequence, the fight usually builds until it explodes…or until it dies down and simmers for a very long time. Neither of these potential endings are desirable.

Gottman went on to say that at any given time, based upon everything else going on in a person’s life, the probability that one person in a relationship can be “emotionally available” or “attuned” to their partner is 50%. Put that with another person who is also attuned at a 50% probability level, multiply them together and the result becomes this: At any given time a couple is together, they might BOTH be emotionally aware or available to their partner 25% of the time. The other 75% of the time could potentially end up in a dark, sticky place with both trying desperately to get out of what they just entered.

I’ve been there. Have you? In the middle of a conflict with someone you love and you just can’t get out? So where’s the “Emergency Exit?” Gottman called these times “Sliding Door Moments.” He coined the phrase from a Gwenyth Paltrow movie that Suzanne said ‘wasn’t really that good, but must have had redeeming values to provide this metaphor.’ (Yes, she whispered that to me during the speech.) Sliding Door moments basically boil down to a split-second of time where you reach out, slide away the glass and open up yourself to the other person in the fight.

Gottman described one of these moments wherein he noticed his wife was sad. He began brushing her hair and asked, “What’s the matter, baby?” She disclosed to him that her mother had been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s and she couldn’t grasp the fact that she was going to die in such a difficult manner. He said that the moment before he “attuned” to her sad face, he wanted his own needs met. He chose, instead, to ask her about the look on her face. He wasn’t in a conflict with her at the time, but they were definitely in that 25% time where neither were really regarding the other. An escalation could have easily happened.

So how do you find a Sliding Door moment in the middle of a Roach Motel fight? Look at their face. Your partner is hurting, they’re sad, they’re angry, they’re alone…they need something. You stop, slide the door open, and think about what they’re really trying to say to you. You might not necessarily have to pick up the hairbrush and begin stroking their hair, but you CAN connect with them and ask, “What’s really the matter, baby?” Some people call it a time out. Some people call this slowing things down. I call it realizing your partner is a human being with feelings and thoughts.

Chances are, they’ll look into your eyes and see the exit. Isn’t it nice how Emergency Exit signs illuminate a dark place?