All posts by Red Dirt Kelly

Oklahoma culture

Tall Tales by Pistol Pete: “The Toad and the Snake”

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Frank "Pistol Pete" Eaton and his wife Anne Eaton on the eve of his 90th birthday. Notice his cake server?

When I was a little girl, my uncle Jimmy Yates told me that he was having a hard time growing anything in his back yard, so he cut up his garden hose and planted it just to see what would happen.  Much to his surprise, a beautiful tree grew nice and strong and shaded the back yard, but even more surprising was that when it bloomed and harvest time came, he had the nicest crop of licorice whips he ever did see.  He thought he’d try planting rocks next time and see if there wasn’t a good crop of rock candy to harvest this time next year.

Of course, I believe him until the very end of the story, he got rewarded with my grins, and he did his job by keeping a straight face through the entire escapade.

Uncle Jimmy was a life-time Okie and a story teller.  My Uncle Dean was a story teller.  My whole family, on both sides of the tree (as well as my husband’s) were full of real tales, tall tales, jokes and ghost stories.  It’s a family theme for us, but it’s really a family theme for the state.  Okies can tell tales like not too many others around the U.S.

Case in point? Frank “Pistol Pete” Eaton.  There are books written about his life, a few videos that are pretty good summary statements covering portions of his life, and then tall tales about the Tale-maker himself.  However, I thought you might like to read a few for yourself, written by his own hand.  So, every once in a while I’ll put in a few of his “Truthful Pete Says” articles he origianlly wrote for the Perkins Journal newspaper in 1950.

Continue reading Tall Tales by Pistol Pete: “The Toad and the Snake” →

Relationships

Twelve Ways to Get PREPARE’d for Long Term Commitment

Calling all couples who are past the DTR talk and are now considering long term commitment such as engagement, marriage or an alternative long-term relationship: this essay is for YOU.

You now have more choices than ever before in terms of taking smart, educational and healthy steps in a “prevention” way to invest in “relationship insurance,” so to speak. Regardless of what you call it, taking the time to get your relationship fine-tuned is one of the biggest gifts you can give each other.

Research shows that depending upon the program you choose, preventative education or premarital counseling can help your relationship stay together, on average, 3-8 years longer than couples who did nothing. This finding isn’t saying that your relationship is simply going to break down at a later date; it means that you’ve helped your relationship beat the divorce or break-up odds by taking 8-12 hours of time together –  to think through plans, skills, and meanings of what you’re getting ready to begin. In other words, the odds will be even MORE in your favor than before.

In other-other words? Premarital or pre-commitment preparation is a no-brainer. A hard core, serious, bona fide NO-BRAINER!

Continue reading Twelve Ways to Get PREPARE’d for Long Term Commitment →

Foodie Page, My Little Victory Garden, Oklahoma culture

My Little Victory Garden: Entry One

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Daily Harvest - This one was from September 26, 2010.

Gardening means so many positive things to me that I was having a hard time finding just the right phrase to title my new series.  I gave serious consideration to “Kelly Does Dirt,” “Dirty Fingernails Are Nature’s Perfect Manicure,” “Fresh Veggies Are Better Than Making Whoopee,” …well, you get the picture.  In other words, I was having a hard core creativity block.

When I gave up brainstorming and closed my laptop, the title “Victory Garden” popped into my head.  I realized I didn’t even know the history of the term.  So, I “Wikied” it.  *I’m guessing I utilize the resource at least once a day.  Here’s what I learned:

Victory gardens, also called war gardens or food gardens for defense, were vegetable, fruit and herb gardens planted at private residences and public parks in United States, United Kingdom, Canada and Germany[1] during World War I and World War II to reduce the pressure on the public food supply brought on by the war effort. In addition to indirectly aiding the war effort these gardens were also considered a civil “morale booster” — in that gardeners could feel empowered by their contribution of labor and rewarded by the produce grown. This made victory gardens become a part of daily life on the home front.

What a gift! History had at that moment handed me what I needed.  It seems that there has been somewhat of a resurgence the past few years in private residence and public community gardens.  Further, my gardens have been my own personal morale booster; they truly have helped me feel empowered by the contribution to our family and health.  The “reward of labor” comes almost daily at the height of summer’s harvest.

My first garden's carrots, ready the last week in June, 2009.

Continue reading My Little Victory Garden: Entry One →

Art, Photography

Silent Sunday: 2/20/10 ~ Sissy Osteen’s Work

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I was inspired to enjoy photography by my father, Benoit, who took photos and developed them in the darkroom. He really loved the Polaroid camera and I remember how fascinated I was when he would pull out the photo and rub the solution across. I took pictures most of my life. My sister, Roxanna, was an artist in every way. When she picked up the camera, I put it down. I knew I could not compete. When she died on 2004, I picked up the camera again and determined that I would be the eye for both of us. I believe that taking pictures can help anyone develop an ability for capturing details that others may not necessarily see, bringing into view a new perspective of the subject portrayed. To facilitate that for myself I always sit next to the window, watch the changes in light and shadow and look behind me when I shoot.

Flowers are a fascination and joy to me. They are like jewelry and contribute color and beauty to the landscape in their own time. Close up, they exhibit an almost unnatural variation in color, texture and even movement. Landscapes and architecture are another favorite as they often combine soft and hard textures in a complete package. I think the contrast between what nature creates and humans construct is interesting. Charleston, SC is one of my favorite places to photograph because of the history, but visiting Italy is a photographers dream. Everything in view is a picture.

These pictures are a combination of my favorite flowers and architecture. Additionally, I took the last picture from an airplane as I realized we were flying into a storm. Someone even asked if I took it through the window of the plane! I hardly knew what to say.

~ Sissy Osteen

Continue reading Silent Sunday: 2/20/10 ~ Sissy Osteen’s Work →

Relationships

How to Teach Your Children About Marriage…Without Saying A Word

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New parents, and new marriage teachers.

Have you ever seen a child imitate a behavior they just observed?  Or catch them trying something out they saw happen in their home, on TV or when they were in a public location?  These small snapshots of a day in the life of a developing child can make anyone smile.  However, they also give us first hand examples of just how impressionable young minds are.

Depending upon what professional you speak with, these imitation behaviors might be attributed to “Learning Theory,” or in some situations, “Script Theory.”  Other family scientists call it “modeling” or attribute a child’s actions to something called “Symbolic Interaction.”  But regardless of what this phenomenon is called, it’s real.  It happens every day in the life of a parent and child.  And, it’s way more powerful than you might sometimes think.

I wish I had a positive impact video to show you along side this particular clip.  However, I think it does a pretty good job and getting the message across of my post today:

Continue reading How to Teach Your Children About Marriage…Without Saying A Word →

Oklahoma culture, Politics

Silent Sunday Afternoon Edition: 2/13/11 ~ Valentines Day 1911

Obviously, the political cartoonist of the day thought England (personified as "John Bull") was jealous of the budding USA-Canadian relationship.
A "loving" relationship between both parties in the legislature was featured in this post as an "era of good feeling" at the State Capitol.

Continue reading Silent Sunday Afternoon Edition: 2/13/11 ~ Valentines Day 1911 →

Art, Photography

The Walls of My Home Have Become My Refrigerator Door

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Earlier this week I wrote a post about a whiteboard on my refrigerator. I was surprised to realize that what used to be covered in childhood art created in elementary school or in spontaneous ways at home was no longer there. “The art studio (refrigerator)” is being used for its purpose now, and that’s about it.  I remember just last year sorting through all of Rylee’s school paper piles; we pulled out the neatly stacked and tied piles representing each year…she kept the selections she loved the best, and the rest got recycled.  Rylee is 19 and my eldest is 23.

I realized, however, that with the emerging of the refrigerator door and sides of the appliance (they’re nearly clean now) came the decorating of the walls in my home.  Both my girls are artists. Rachel studies art in college and Rylee is studying to enter an artistic vocation.  There are samples of their work all over my home.  Here, let me take you on a tour:

This is an image by Rachel I see when I wake up in the morning. It is on my west bedroom wall. The morning light plays with the sketched lines influencing the image to range from dreamy to wistful.

Continue reading The Walls of My Home Have Become My Refrigerator Door →

Relationships

Our Troubadours of the 21st Century

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There is a small magnetic whiteboard on my refrigerator.  The white plastic apparatus, clinging by electromagnetic magic to the fingerprint smudged stainless steel veneer, catches my eye every time I turn on my lights in the morning.  The whiteboard has become a beacon, a challenge, and a reminder of things to think about I didn’t know I should consider.

Why?  Because my future son-in-law puts quotes on the board and leaves them there.  Sometimes I see him writing them.  Other times I’m surprised with a new message.  But they’re always powerful; they’re full of the angst and strength of young lovers and budding poets and young men and women discovering the world.  They remind me of the troubadours of the High Middle Ages.  And, they remind me that humans are passionate…that I should take care with the souls of those whom fate has placed in my family on Earth.

Continue reading Our Troubadours of the 21st Century →

Oklahoma culture, Photography

Silent Sunday: 2/6/11 ~ Images From Other Oklahoma Websites We Like

Zach Gray is a really special asset to Oklahoma. From Ada, he currently resides at Stillwater. Both his blog and Flickr site are something else. If you'd like to see photos of the Bedlam game that have a great perspective (as good or better than some of the major sports outlets), visit his Flickr site by clicking this photo. If you'd like to visit his blog, you can get there by visiting his Flickr profile. Zach, your work is beautiful!
We've not yet introduced you to Dee Nash and her "Red Dirt Ramblings" blog about her garden. This photo caption from her site mentioned that she and her watering can were waiting for Spring. Click this photo to visit her site and her "Ramblings." Dee does a great job and we're glad to have her as part of the Red Dirt family-hood. (We've added her onto our blog roll today so you can find her if you want to go there from here.)

Continue reading Silent Sunday: 2/6/11 ~ Images From Other Oklahoma Websites We Like →

Red Dirt Rambler

Red Dirt Ramblers Trip #1 Final Stop: Wagon Creek Creamery, Helena, OK

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When I was younger, all I could think about was traveling and perhaps living somewhere other than my home state of Oklahoma.

When I reached college age, all I could think about was traveling and perhaps living somewhere within the region of Oklahoma, but certainly outside of the state.  Arkansas? Colorado? I needed mountains.  Or at least really tall hills.

When I reached thirty I took our children on short trips around the state and shared information with them about what sites were, the history behind them, and meanings attached to certain landmarks.  I was glad our state had cool little places like Horsethief Canyon.  For a mere $3.00 suggested donation, you can hike all day around the place and read about the “hanging tree,” imagine horsethiefs camping out by the river, and hang out with your family – which is probably the coolest part of all.

Now that I’m 47, I can’ t get enough of Oklahoma and the people living in our state.  And stops like “Wagon Creek Creamery” in Helena, Oklahoma continue to proof this thesis for me over and over again.  Can I tell you just how cool this local dairy establishment is?  Julie and I were only there 30 minutes and I think I learned more about paddocking and the milk cow rotation processes than I’ve known all together my entire life.  Our teacher?  One of the co-owners.  The classroom?  His combination office and what looked to be a dining room of sorts.  The students?  Julie and I.  And, man did we learn stuff!

Let me back up just a bit.  We had left the Vintage Inn B&B early that morning in order to make one final stop before we headed back to the greater metropolitan life of Oklahoma City.  We were nearing the farm and pulled into a small convenience store in Helena to double check our directions.  If you ever want to find anything in any small town, just find a convenience store with booths and coffee in the morning, and you’ll find a group of locals who will get you where you’re going.  That was certainly the case this time.  I pulled up, ran in to the little place, spied a group of about 8 men crammed into two booths and a couple of them sitting on stools, ran over and said:  “Hello there, local group of citizens.  I need your help!”

Continue reading Red Dirt Ramblers Trip #1 Final Stop: Wagon Creek Creamery, Helena, OK →

Relationships

Seven Things You Should Expect From a Couples or Family Therapist

From Moonstruck

I.
Rose: Do you love him, Loretta?
Loretta Castorini: No.
Rose: Good. When you love them they drive you crazy because they know they can.

II.
Rose: Do you love him, Loretta?
Loretta Castorini: Aw, ma, I love him awful.
Rose: Oh, God, that’s too bad.

***

Early February serves as a reminder to consider those you love platonically, as well as those with whom you are in a romantic relationship.  National Marriage Week is celebrated during Valentine’s Day season, and we see lots of information on television and the internet about how people enjoy their special time together, all in the name of Love.  What also happens, however, is that Valentine’s Day sometimes brings to the front of our minds things that aren’t going so well.  This is because, for some, the thought or events surrounding the season inevitably point them back home…where the heart is….or, where the heart MIGHT be if it weren’t for the fact that they were arguing all the time.

For those of you who plan to go out and have a wonderful time during the upcoming “week of love,” we wish you the best.  But for those of you who might be considering the possibility of getting some positive change in an unhealthy relationship, I want to make sure you have this list.  I’ve practiced therapy for ten years now and have summarized a list of standards you should expect if you decide to get counseling for your relationship. The list is based upon discussions with my own clients, and also from cases I’ve supervised:

Continue reading Seven Things You Should Expect From a Couples or Family Therapist →

Oklahoma culture, Relationships

Silent Sunday: 1/30/11 ~ What I Think But Do Not Say

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Out loud: Grandma - "Oh, I need to buckle my seat belt!" In my head: "Yes you do, Grandma. I want you to be safe and sound for all the weddings and family events possible. Make sure it's latched...we love you."
Out loud: "Do you want to take a photo of the table before we serve everyone?" Me out loud: "Yes, great idea. I'm on it!" Me in my head: "Do you have any idea how much I appreciate you all right now? Your table is beautiful and you got her a Raspberries n' Creme cake, even though they're expensive. You're melting my heart right now."

Continue reading Silent Sunday: 1/30/11 ~ What I Think But Do Not Say →

Foodie Page, Oklahoma culture

Friday Morning Shout Out: Café 501

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The assorted cheeses small plate. Red currant compote, green apple and radish slaw, seasoned pecans, toasted French baguettes and a selection of cheese.

In 1993, my husband and I moved back to Edmond with two kids; when we had left Edmond in 1990, we only had one.  We had just finished a short three-year stint in an historical home located in Lincoln Terrace, south of the State Capitol.  I still miss that old home, but after having spent several years during my college days at the University of Central Oklahoma, had two children go through their entire primary and secondary education years here, and after having lived here now for a total of twenty-two married years, and a couple of “unmarried years” before that, I feel like my adopted home town is indeed Edmond, Oklahoma.

So, I feel invested in this town.  And I feel proud of the special places and amenities it has to offer.

One of my favorite places I’ve been appreciating since it opened is Café 501, located on 5th street and Boulevard, just a little south and east of the downtown area.  It’s pretty easy to remember how to get there; the address is the name of the place (501 S. Boulevard) and the phone number includes the name: (405) 359-0501.  But I don’t like the restaurant just because I can remember where to go!  I like the restaurant because I’m kind of a food snob.  I worked in the institutional foodservice distribution business for seven years and visited a great many kitchens during that time.  And, have looked at hundreds of menus.  And, have had lots and lots of not-so-great meals in restaurants over the past twenty-five years.  When I go to Café 501, however, I don’t worry about that.

Continue reading Friday Morning Shout Out: Café 501 →

Grandmother's Memoirs, Oklahoma culture

One Voice of the Oklahoma Prairie, Conclusion

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Kenny, Emma Lee's eldest son, playing the guitar sometime around 1967. Terry, her younger son, can be seen on the far left.

Mom was born March 16, 1891 near Ashland, Kansas. Her parents were William Tecumseh Sherman Crouch and Atlanta Bell Kitchen Crouch.  The both came from the areas near Ashland and Grayson Kentucky.  Grandpa homesteaded in Kansas where mom was born; they lived in a dug out.  Later they moved to Lahoma, Oklahoma where mom and Papa were married, then after that moved to Tuttle, Oklahoma where Papa farmed.  After farming in Tuttle, then moved to Bethany, Oklahoma (near Okla. City), to Waukomis, OK near Enid, OK on Highway 81 then back to Tuttle when Terry was a year old (1944). Mom moved to Fayetteville, AR helped cook in a girls dormitory, then she and Robert moved to Okla. City worked in O’Mealy’s cafeteria. Later she moved to Tulsa to help my brother Charles in a restaurant, then when Charles moved to Arkansas Mom and Robert moved back to Tuttle, OK. (Editors note: I count ten separate locations where “Mom” [Bessie] called home at one point or another.)

Mom was a real sweet person, she always wanted to do nice things for people.  She loved to study and read the Bible. Every Saturday she prepared dinner for someone; her food was so good and attractive.  Mom could always write the sweetest notes for all occasions. She lived to the age of 84 – died November 30, 1975 as she was taking a bath, getting ready to go to church.  She had a heart attack on Sunday morning.  On the Friday night before she died, she felt her days were numbered, so she got up in the night and wrote the instructions for her funeral.

I remember at one time in 1987 there were six of us in our 60s.  J.C. 69, Catherine 68, Charles 66, Emma Lee 64, Mary Elizabeth 63, Willa May 60; imagine having that many children in ten years!

Continue reading One Voice of the Oklahoma Prairie, Conclusion →

Oklahoma culture, Red Dirt Rambler, Travel

Red Dirt Ramblers Stop #4 ~ Vintage Inn B&B, Alva, OK

Vintage Inn Formal Den ~ Photo by Bed & Breakfast Finder, Vintage Inn Link.

Kelly’s perspective ~

So, there we were, see…extremely full from dinner, exhausted from driving all over the state and still had one little eleven mile trip to go.  Julie’s friends were so incredibly nice to us; they really were like ambassadors to the Alva area.  They actually let us follow them down the road from Bulington to Alva and on to the Vintage Inn Bed & Breakfast. They then showed us where to park, helped us find our way inside, and then gave us a personal tour! Brenda was evidently a Realtor and had shown the house several times in the past.  She and Mike led us through the grand entry, showed us the dining room and kitchen, and then up the beautiful staircase we went to the second floor level of rooms…and then on up to the third floor level!  I’ve included two photos from their link above, but there are more if you’d like to check out their site; their bedrooms are each unique, cozy and now are furnished with large flat-screen television sets.  They also have wireless internet access, which helped us that evening because I had a post to edit!

Vintage Inn Foyer, Bed & Breakfast Finder Site - Vintage Inn Link. Ask either Lori or Sherri to tell you about how they refinished the plaster sculpting pattern on the beautiful Victorian ceiling.

What I appreciated about our personal tour provided by Brenda and Mike was the chance to hear voices of the community speak with pride about the Inn.  Every time we turned a corner, another story emerged.  Thank you, Brenda, for setting such a lovely context within which Julie and I could venture forth!

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Oklahoma culture

RDC Friday Morning Shout Out: The Oklahoma County Sheriff’s Office Mounted Patrol

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The OCSO Mounted Patrol assisting the Oklahoma State Bureau of Investigation in the search for a missing young lady.

Note:  This post was authored by RDC friend, Sam Chesnut ~ One of our very special OCSO Mounted Patrol Members.  I added the “Shout Out” language to the title of this post.  They’re certainly deserving of some kudos from our group today.  Thanks, OCSO-MP, for all you do.~ RDC Editor

Have you ever heard the phrases, “Back to the future,” or “That’s so old it’s new?”  Well that very approach applies to one of the newest/old forms of law enforcement in operation today.  It is the use of horses in patrol and special services provided for modern day law enforcement.  The Oklahoma County Sheriff’s Office is one of the very few organized, operational mounted patrol units in existence in Oklahoma.  The OCSO Mounted Patrol is a progressive concept supported and expanded by Oklahoma County Sheriff John Whetsel.  Sheriff Whetsel has utilized the Mounted Patrol in general and specialized patrol, agency assists, field searches, and crowd control.  The usefulness of the Equine Mounted Patrol in law enforcement is only limited by your imagination, and the particular situation at hand.

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Relationships, Woman2Woman

Shaking the Saddlebags #2: The Fantastic Fear Trifecta

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Here's Molly, in all her trainer glory. She's the one who ignores my whimpering, keeps her calm (when I'm anything but), and remembers to ask me if I need a drink or a break every once in a while. I'll post a photo of Brennen next time I write about my saddlebags.

Note – occasionally I write posts about my relationship with myself.  This is one such post.  It’s about my relationship with my Saddlebags.  You can search “Saddlebags” to catch the history of these posts, or go here for the entry prior to this one.

***

I hate going to the dentist.  I have a past childhood, former adolescence and present adulthood so filled with dental trauma that I know I’ll never get over the all-encompassing fear I face every sixth months of my life.  Seriously.

When I was a kid, I had four permanent teeth removed for braces, I had four wisdom teeth removed prior to getting braces (plus a little piece of my jawbone – they had impacted, and having no where else to turn, went downward…into my jaw), cavities galore, more shots than I’ll ever be able to count…I puke when the dentist tries to give me laughing gas.  Can you tell I’m serious here? I really, really hate going to the dentist.  Now, I’m in the process of getting crowns because of all my cavities and I’m only finished with number three.  I have to get seven.  I also hate it when people tell me dentist stories…and I’ve just put you through an entire paragraph of mine. Oh my heavenly days – please forgive me! I have a point.  Really…

My point is that I fear going to the dentist.  I hope that’s clear.  But I have realized since last November that I’ve been fearing going to the gym, practically at the same level of intensity…to shake my saddlebags, remember?  I mean I really worked myself up on how hard it was going to be to start a workout regimen again, and I had to literally drag myself into the gym the first time.  After generating so much lactic acid that I became nauseous and spent some quality time over the toilet, I decided that working out wasn’t just scary – – it was horrific.  So horrific that it took me six full days for my muscles to quit aching from the first workout.  I recall not being able to sit on the carpet during Thanksgiving because the prospect of getting back up meant moving my legs, arms and abdomen and that would induce pain…Pain!

Continue reading Shaking the Saddlebags #2: The Fantastic Fear Trifecta →

Grandmother's Memoirs, Oklahoma culture

One Voice of the Oklahoma Prairie, Cont. (4)

Quentin Bomgardner shown in a park, holding his first son, Kenny.

Quentin started working as a substitute mail carrier and later (about 1949) started working as clerk in the Post Office at Tuttle so we started having a little more money to spend. In February, 1956, he got a rural mail route at Amber, Oklahoma.  He carried the mail until November 15th, 1956 when he died of a brain hemorrhage; age 36, he lacked two weeks being 37.  This was a sad day for Kenny, Terry and me.  I didn’t know what I could do to make a living.  I didn’t know how to do anything but clean house.  I carried mail for 3 months at Amber, in Quentin’s place, until they appointed a carrier.  We got $125.00 per month annuity, $4,000 insurance from the Post Office, and $1,500 from Universal Life Insurance.  Since the place we lived in belonged to Grandmother Porter, we bought a house in town for $3,800. And spent $700 on it before we moved in.  Uncle Gail and Uncle Dwight helped use fix it up.  We were very comfortably situated.

Continue reading One Voice of the Oklahoma Prairie, Cont. (4) →

Favorite Things, Foodie Page, Oklahoma culture, Red Dirt Rambler, Travel

Red Dirt Ramblers, Stop #3: The Vintage House Restaurant, Burlington, OK

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Kevin (prounced kee-vun) Kraft sits down with our dinner group to tell stories about the Vintage House restaurant development after he and wife, Lori, serenaded the dining room. Kevin runs "the smokehouse," cooks the steaks, and owns the restaurant with his wife.

Julie’s view:

After leaving Dan McGuinness in Edmond, Kelly and I knew we were heading north, but we didn’t really have a set plan.  She suggested that I call Nancy at Cordero Farms.  An answering machine greeted me, so we decided to just head north on I-35.  Our other option was Alva, OK.  By this time, it was getting dark, so we decided we needed to find a place to spend the night.  Earlier in the day when Kelly mentioned we might go to Alva, I decided to call a sorority sister who lived there.  I only mentioned that we might be going that direction and that I would call her if we decided to take that route.  I added that I didn’t want her to hear that I’d been there and her be upset with me if I hadn’t called.  I laughed; she simply said that she’d know if I showed up.  Hmmm.  It turns out she was not kidding.  Kelly called the bed and breakfast that she’d heard so much about, and got us a room. One room…the only one available.  After she made sure it was okay with me that we had to share a room AND a bed after only meeting a few hours earlier we committed to the reservation.  I mean, we were in the middle of nowhere by this time.  I could also tell from Kelly’s end of the conversation that we were being invited to the local restaurant for a late dinner.

Continue reading Red Dirt Ramblers, Stop #3: The Vintage House Restaurant, Burlington, OK →