I learned quite a bit while in China. For example, the Chinese don’t have a custom of wearing wedding rings to signal they are married. Therefore, if someone wants to know your marital status, they ask, “Have you solved your problem?”
Our guide also told us that while some time ago their citizens used to greet each other with basically, “How are you?” like we do in the U.S., that custom changed as difficult times were encountered. They now ask, “Have you eaten?” And, the answer, in order to protect the friend who is asking so they won’t worry, is always “yes.”
A man walks into a barber shop and sits in the chair. The barber asks, “How do you want your hair cut?” The man says, “I want it short on one side, uneven on the other side, crooked in the front and a hacked up in the back.” The barber shakes his head and says, “I don’t know if I can do that.” The man replied, “I don’t know why not, you had no problem last time.”
I like jokes. I happen to know one of the world’s foremost and talented joke tellers. His name is Robert “Uncle Bob” Caldwell. He lives is Granbury, Texas. I love that guy. I always wanted to be able to tell jokes like Uncle Bob. He could sure deliver a punch line.
One thing I’ve learned about punch lines, they don’t necessarily have to be in the context of a joke to be humorous. Sometimes a good punch line is simply the “pay-off” in a story.
NO BRAG. JUST FACT
It was a typical day in the barber shop— Dad was cutting hair, and his customer was resting comfortably with his eyes closed.
The front door opened, and Dad glanced up to say, “Morning. Come in, you’re next.”
One of my favorite movies as a child was The Alamo. I remember this Hollywood version of Texas history very well. I don’t think historical accuracy was a major goal of the director, John Wayne, who also starred as Col. Davy Crockett. I remember watching Santa Anna’s Mexican army sweep into the Alamo and there was big John Wayne, swinging his Kentucky long-rifle, gallantly fighting to the last.
Before the final and climatic battle there was a romantic scene. I’m talking about girls and kissing and yucky stuff that eight year boys can’t stand. I’m talking about ‘kid romantic’; I’m referring to a kid who loved Daniel Boone, Superman, and six-shooters.
The Most Romantic Scene: The ‘Texacans’ and other Americans were gathered inside the walls of the Alamo. Col. William Travis (Laurence Harvey) stood before them and explained the situation looked bad, real bad. They were tremendously outnumbered (7,000 to 185) and no help was on the way. Colonel William Travis is hoping to give Houston the time he needs to pull his forces together.
Travis speaks to the men who have been defending the Alamo. He tells them there will be no shame if anybody wants to leave.
Richard Widmark, a real Hollywood tough guy plays the role of Sam Bowie. For some reason lies on a blanket unable to stand. In the most remarkable and indelibly imprinted movie scene of this eight year old had ever seen, Col. Travis draws a line in the sand. If you cross that line in the sand, you are saying you’ll stay no matter what. Nobody moved.
Then, Sam Bowie, laid out on a blanket says, “Carry me over boys,” or something like that. Then all the other Alamo defenders step over the line. I’ll never forget the image of that line in the sand.
Salt. What an amazing additive. Salt. Never set the table without it. Most of us handle a salt shaker each and every day. For me, it always made food taste better. In the right amounts salt will accentuate the natural flavor of an otherwise bland food.
The Salt of the Earth
Jesus said, “You are the salt of the earth.” What a brilliant description of His children— they bring the flavor of God’s Kingdom into the earth.
A playful paraphrase would be, “My children are in the world to accentuate the real purposes of creation.” What if society declared, It’s so great that we have so many Christians living in our city, they are such great fun, lively, gracious people; they just make everything a little better!Continue reading Barbershop Theology – Pass the Salt→
I first heard a small diatribe on the subject of faith while visiting Dad’s barber shop. I was a college student and had grown very interested in my parents’ renewed passion for Christ. I tuned in a bit more than usual when a fella that I barely knew started to deliver his discourse on faith.
As I recall his talk, I remember it as just that—a lot of talk. It sounded something like this…
“It’s all about faith, you know. When we get sick, God’s just testing us to see if we can get rid of all our questions and just believe in Him and his power. Why, just the other day I believed really hard that God could heal my aching back, and he did! I was tempted to doubt, but I didn’t let it get to me. My faith healed me!”
I listened as this customer in my dad’s shop proclaimed his conviction that “most of the world’s problems are really just because people don’t have enough faith,” and that poverty, sickness, and pain could be effectively wiped out if people would just extinguish their doubts with a fire hose of super-powerful trust in God.
His talk concerned me. Maybe he knew how to muster up that kind of super-strong faith, but I’m here to confess, I’ve never really been a person who’s been able to get rid of all his doubts or questions. In fact, I would give myself a C- if I had to submit a report card on myself. Continue reading Barbershop Theology: My Faith Hero→
A straight razor is an imposing instrument. I have watched my dad use one a thousand times, my mom too for that matter.
I loved to watch Dad extend the razor strap and whisk the blade back and forth on it. He would hone that blade to a pristine cutting edge before giving a shave or neatly trimming around a fresh haircut.
Customers who asked for a shave relaxed and wholly trusted Dad to set that blade to their face and throat. The steps were simple. First the customer was laid back in the barber’s chair, then Dad jerked the side lever and gently pulled the back to a vertical position. Next a steaming towel, bearably hot, was put on the face. A nice lather followed and as the whiskers were pacified, Dad prepared the blade for the task.
I don’t remember a time when my parents didn’t take us to church of one kind or another. I distinctly recall when I was 11 years old and we started going to a non-denominational church in Newcastle. They were a charismatic community. They were “on fire for the Lord,” people raised their hands, spoke in tongues, and shouted a lot of “Yes, Jesus!” exclamations throughout the congregation. I thought it was a little weird at first. It was totally unlike anything I had ever experienced before. That soon became our church home and we were there nearly every Sunday morning, Sunday night, and Wednesday night. I even started volunteering in the children’s church because I loved working with kids.
Growing up in the Christian faith, I believed in God, quite frankly, because I always had. That’s the way I was raised. I’m thankful that my parents raised me in church. I was baptized, was involved with the youth group and never questioned anything I had learned. As I got older and started working, I went to church a lot less but I never stopped believing in God. I was raised in the Bible Belt, after all. I didn’t know anyone that didn’t believe in the same God I did. Continue reading Simple Sabbath: Why I Believe→
How many words are in the Bible? “In the beginning God . . .” Look, four words at the start.
“Yes, I am coming soon.” Amen. Come, Lord Jesus. The grace of the Lord Jesus be with God’s people. Amen.
See that? There are twenty more words at the end of the last book of the Bible.
I read somewhere that there are maybe a million words in the Bible. I spent my whole childhood hoping to find a genie in a bottle or get a wish; my goal was to ask for a million dollars. I figured a million of anything would be plenty.
Growing up in my dad’s barber shop taught me many life lessons. One lesson was how to give good directions. Quite often a stranger would step into the shop to ask for directions to a farm, or place like Boone, Broxton, Richard’s Spur or Porter Hill. Sometimes they would name a place three doors around the corner. A barber shop on Main Street was an easy find. Our directions went something like this: “Go up to the light (the only red light in town) and turn north, go `bout a half mile and turn back west. Head on out past the Sale Barn and go a `lil over five miles and turn right out there where the road bends. It’s just right there across a `lil-lo bridge.” Continue reading Barber Shop Theology – Directions→
Have you heard the story of Blind Bartimaeus? It’s found in the Gospel of Mark. You can read it in your bible (and I’ll attach the passage at the bottom of this Simple Sabbath post.)
Here is a story where Jesus leads us to understand real meaning. The symbolic and spiritual Truth of our existence is in this story. Okay, let’s state the obvious—the blind man here is a symbol of the inability to take in spiritual vision. There is an incapacity to Continue reading Simple Sabbath – I Want to See→
I have attended college. I have attended four of them. I learned a lot at college. I have degrees that suggest, “Hey, this guy learned.” But I can never replace the lessons I learned as the shoe-shine boy in my dad’s barbershop.
Hundreds of people came through Caldwell’s Barber Shop over the years. Between public school and the barber shop I received an education in Apache, Oklahoma. Here’s another story that has helped me understand a little more about the world, myself, and the truth to live by.
Salesmen and “Simpletons”
A unique sub-set of folks that came through Apache viewed us locals as rubes or hayseeds. I was always entertained when some of the locals would oblige the stereotype. They did it purposefully. Most of the people that visited our fair small town were gracious, winsome, and very kind. A few of them were condescending (a few salesmen) they “shore was high themselves.”
As a boy, I was maybe ten or eleven years old, I could be easily impressed by a smooth presentation and a new gizmo with an interesting name. The old timers who loitered in Dad’s barbershop weren’t so easily moved. My job was to observe from the sideline as the pitchman worked the crowd and then watch as one of the locals morphed into Gomer Pyle. Continue reading Barbershop Theology – a lesson from a hot check→
As people we fail; as friends we fail; as a spouse we fail. Failure is in us and all around us.
Phil Mickelson, golf
Misery loves company – – – Or so I’ve heard. I do know that I feel better about my shortcomings when I see others who struggle. Just the other day I watched my favorite professional golfer, Phil Mickelson, miss a two-footer. TWO FEET!!! Come on, man!!! Oh well, I understand. I miss plenty of the same kinds of putts.
I’m re-reading one of my favorite books, The Killer Angels, a Pultizer Prize winning historical novel by Michael Shaara. The book tells the story of four days of the Battle of Gettysburg. The first time I read the book it made me cry. I was sad for all parties involved.
I’m a huge fan of General R.E. Lee. Huge! (Lincoln too)
General Robert E. Lee
But as I read the story yet again, I find myself saying, “Please listen to Longstreet, and please don’t march those young men into the Union center.” But Mr. Lee is very stubborn and the carnage is nauseating. Following the frontal assault on the third day of Gettysburg Lee surveys his beaten army and say, “All this has been my fault.” The venerable Lee had failed*.
Do we know anyone else who has failed? How did Jesus’ students do at test time? In Matthew 26:2 Jesus said, “You know that after two days the Passover is coming and the Son of Man is to be delivered up for crucifixion.”
He went on teaching them of things to come and we pick up this familiar story in the Garden.
Judas' symbol of failure
1. First we recount Judas’ betrayal. He rats Jesus out. We see this picture of a Benedict Arnold; he double-crosses Jesus; he is a snitch, a squealer, a two-faced friend. The term Judas’ Kiss is forever a despicable image.
Consider all the ways we are unfaithful to Jesus in the same manner. When we allow our plan to supplant the purpose of Jesus Christ, we betray the Lord.
2. Jesus asks his disciples “keep watch” with Him in the Garden. They fall asleep. We see this picture of sloth, laziness and/or indifference. They must have really been tired, huh? Continue reading Simple Sabbath — Because We Fail→
I’ve heard it said that the gospel is simple enough for a child to understand and still so complex that theologians can discuss it at great length. This makes the gospel all the more beautiful.
Just how wonderful is the gospel? Even angels long to look into these things. I Peter 1:12
Precisely what is this gospel? It is ‘good news’. But what is the content of this good news? Well, for this Barber Shop Theological foray, let’s see the big and the small of the Gospel.
My dad, Oscar, first stepped behind the barber’s chair of his shop in Apache, Oklahoma in January of 1963. I was in the first grade. There is no telling how many thousands of haircuts he has given over the past 48 years.
My dad tried to retire once and sold his shop in town, but a stream of guys from around town found their way to the house and the chair he had put into the garage, and soon he was only semi-retired. To this day, he still greets customers by their first names as they show up a mile north of town to get a haircut. On my recent visit home Continue reading Barber Shop Theology – The Big & Small of it→
What shall it profit a man if he should gain the whole world (even if he hurries) and lose his soul. Mark 8:36
Speed. There is definitely a need for speed in our society. Wait, did I say need? Okay, there is a want for speed. You might think that with all the time-saving devices, gizmos, and machines at our disposal, we would have plenty of time to sit and ponder. Nope, we are busier than ever.
I’m not a terribly impatient person, but I chuckle at my ability to choose the slowest check-out person at the grocery store. In an age of fast foods, express lanes, Jiffy Lubes, quick printing, speed dialing (and dating), instant messages, well, you get the picture — the fact is, we can do more, faster than at any time in history, and yet we regularly hear, “I just don’t have enough time!”
Barber Shop Theology
Last week I referenced the beauty of waiting, particularly, waiting for a haircut. When life puts you in a holding pattern, what do you do with it? Scripture says, “They that wait upon the Lord will renew their strength.” This suggests value in waiting.
Waiting is like most other activities of life, it can serve a wonderful purpose when we choose by faith, to embrace joy because that activity belongs to God. “In everything give thanks for this is the will of God.” (I Thessalonians 5:18).
Waiting and Action
I remember many, many great waiters in my dad’s barber shop. But one young man particularly stand out from the others. He was out of work and was spending more and more of his time reading the newspaper and listening to the barber shop banter. He was developing a routine, complete with a standard answer for those who wanted to know what he was up to.
The LORD is my shepherd, I lack nothing. ~ Psalm23:1
“Hurry up and Wait”
I have an advantage over the others; I have learned the value of waiting. No, I have not perfected waiting, I just know there is an art to it. As a barber’s son and retired shoeshine boy, I have logged many hours just watching people wait. Some are better than others.
“Back in my day,” a phrase I am growing more and more fond of, life moved more slowly. We didn’t have instant anything. The closest thing to space age was Tang and Jiffy Pop. Those two items still amaze me.
Jiffy Pop, space age magic!
I went to my local barber shop a few days ago. I was in a hurry. I don’t remember why, but there was surely an important reason for my rush. The shop was busy, very busy. Darn. Oh well, I have my Blackberry and I can keep up the hurried pace. But something in my barber’s son DNA kicked in; I put my gadget away and decided to wait. It was everything I remembered it to be. Continue reading Barbershop Theology: Waiting for…→
“You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows.” Psalm 23:5
Many of David’s Psalms speak of anguish and heartache. He seems a bit whiney to me at times. Have you ever felt this way? I certainly have—and so did Guy Mitchell. His most famous song was “Singin’ the Blues,” the song of a really sad man. The blues left him with nothing to do but cry y y y y y. Throughout the Psalms we can see David singin’ the blues. He expresses sadness and anguish. At times he sounds like a man who feels all alone; he is filled with hopelessness and despair. David is a man who is all dried up, and at times feels he will be alone the rest of his days. It is against this backdrop of the blues that Psalm 23 seeps from his soul. Continue reading Simple Sabbath – “Drink Up!”→
As I have reflected on those days growing up in the barber shop, it has been fun to romanticize the experience; the wide-eyed wonder of being a boy privileged to hang out in the town “man-cave” has taken me to very vivid recollections. Heck, I’ve managed to charm myself. However, I’m not particularly comfortable or proud of some parts.
This day I reflect on barbershop conversations exactly 45 years ago this month.
History note – June 11, 1966 – Police arrest 22 of about 200 protesters picketing Doe Doe Recreation Park, a private, segregated amusement park with a swimming pool in Lawton.
One of the most wonderful places I went to as a boy was Doe Doe Park. The swimming pool was huge. It had swings, and a tower and multiple diving boards. In 1966 this place was pristine, especially in comparison to all the dirty cow ponds, shallow creeks and muddy lakes most of us were accustomed to. There were no swimming pools in Apache.
I remember Doe Doe Park fondly. I remember that it was for white only. Sadly, that didn’t bother me; it was the world as I knew it.
Doe Doe Park Pool, Lawton
In the barber shop men talked about the “Negroes trying to swim with the whites.” I remember one person referring to some “uppity coloreds causing trouble down at Doe Doe Park.” Apparently some “Northerners” were involved, whatever that meant; I pictured arrogant and rude people. It seemed to me that these were not good people. Now where did I get that idea as a ten year old? Continue reading Barber Shop Theology: Integration of the Mind→
Because I want to be a responsible citizen and give careful note regarding the topic, I’ll submit this preface. Alcohol abuse is bad. Drunkenness is bad. In fact, I would go further and say the only kind of indulgence I have ever seen that isn’t bad is the love of God.
The following recollection is one of my favorite and clearest memories, and for no good reason. I think I just chalk it up to the unique experience a kid could have 40 or 50 years ago. It’s also a tribute to all the other lessons unremembered in the people business.
The Barber’s Son and Shoe Shine Boy
As I have been remembering and writing about the hours I spend in my dad’s barbershop, it has finally dawned on me that what seemed like my entire childhood was actually a short window of time. I was the shoe shine boy in 1965, and probably didn’t retire completely until 1968. Oh, I was in the shop a lot before and after that, but that was when I logged a lot of hours.
As the shoe shine boy I had the cool job of hanging around as men came and went all day. I listened to all manner of talk about the weather, price of cattle and/or references to hippies. Now that I think of it, hippies never came into the barber shop.
Saturdays and Saturday Nights
Saturdays were long. My dad would open the shop at 7am and we didn’t close until 9pm. I waited most Saturday mornings to go to work with my mom. She didn’t step behind her chair until a minute past 9 in the morning. I passed my day by shining shoes for a quarter and slipping off when things got slow to watch guys play pool, maybe play a pin ball machine or splurge to buy a Coke with a shot of cherry or vanilla in it.
On Saturday nights the street in front of the barber shop would always come alive with teenagers “dragging Main”. (Technically it’s Evans Ave. but I only throw that in for posterity.) Continue reading Barbershop Theology: First Haircut→
Zero, or one? Yes, or no? Positive, or negative? Up, or down? Black, or white, or filled with shades of gray?
Americans, much less Oklahomans, probably prefer more choice. I know that I do.
Today both started and ended with multiple option choices. But not in the middle.
At the end: a trip out for frozen yogurt with two of my favorite young ladies, one my Frau, the other our oldest child/frauline. One of us had peanut butter and chocolate. One of us had pineapple. And my choice? A berry, fruity mixture, indeed.
The day began with choices, as well. Do I sit and read whilst the family sleeps? Do I blog? Do I go out and run whilst it is still cool? Like my late day fruity mixture, I chose a little of all three.
I had just started my part of the closing routine in Caldwell’s Barber Shop, sweeping clumps of hair, filling the lather machine, and straightening up the magazine tables. I was at the barber shop following a day at school. Mainly, I was just killing time and hoping we could close promptly at 6:00. I was anxious to go home.
The barber shop door opened and I turned to see Mr. Crews entering. I figured he would sit and wait. He would be the final customer of the day.
Mr. Crews owned the funeral home in Apache, Oklahoma. In fact, these many years later, it’s still Crews Funeral Home located in the middle of town. I always thought Mr. Crews was a really nice guy. But the funeral director didn’t sit. He walked over to my dad and said something, Dad nodded his head. Mr. Crews left.
Dad finished the haircut, thanked his customer and said, “thank you, come back.” (He always said that.)
Then Dad unplugged his clippers and wrapped them in a fresh towel. He placed a pair of scissors in his breast pocket, turned off the lights and as I was already moving toward the door. I ran to jump in the pick-up truck. I started the vehicle since the keys were right there in the ignition.
I slid across to the passenger’s side as Dad climbed in behind the steering wheel. We drove all of a half a block and stopped at Crews’ Funeral Home.
“What are you going to do?” I asked, though I could have guessed.
Peter was shocked; he was insulted. He protested the notion that he would EVER deny his Lord. Jesus rightly predicted Peter’s infidelity. Jesus knew Peter much better than this famous disciple knew himself.
“Lord, I would never do such a thing,” Peter objected.
Jesus calmly replied, “Not only will you deny me once, but you’ll deny me three times.” And Jesus said it would happen before the rooster was well into his morning.
Good Intentions
The thing is, most of us have good intentions. Whether to read the bible more, attend church more regularly, or to start exercising, the spirit is willing.
I’m not going to cuss and no more throwing my golf clubs; I’m nixing the desserts and I’ll stop saying negative things about anybody. It’s the right idea and a great plan. Jesus looks at us, smiles and says, “Grace to you.” I know this. He continually extends that portion to me.
The Barber’s Son and The Deal
On the main street of our little town, all the businesses were owned by our friends and neighbors. Mr. and Mrs. Elliot opened and closed Elliot’s Department store. We purchased our jeans and underwear there. Mr. and Mrs. Hodge operated Hodge’s Grocery Store. He was in the back working as the butcher and she at the counter smiling and saying, “Thank you for coming in.”
We had Evan’s Drugstore, Inman’s Variety Store, Swanda’s Insurance, Lynch’s Western Store, Malone Ford, Kardokus Implements and perhaps the quintessential period piece general store, Levite’s. I can still recall the family names of gas station proprietors. And my favorite spot just a few doors up from Caldwell’s Barber Shop —- George’s Pool Hall. Continue reading Barbershop Theology: Let’s Make a Deal, Pt. 2→
Showcasing Red Dirt culture ~ authored and managed by contributors with connections to the great state of Oklahoma.
I learned quite a bit while in China. For example, the Chinese don’t have a custom of wearing wedding rings to signal they are married. Therefore, if someone wants to know your marital status, they ask, “Have you solved your problem?”
